Conviction
by Velace
Summary: FPPoV - When Queen Regina discovered Snow White and Prince Charming had sent their child to another land, she decided not to enact the Dark Curse. Twenty-two years later, Emma Swan awoke in the Enchanted Forest. Thankful for the escape from the horrors of her previous life, she decides to embrace the new and finds herself amongst the Evil Queen's Guard three years later.
1. Captain of the Guard

**PLEASE READ****: **I began writing this story awhile ago but I ended up ignoring it because I have a huge problem reading stories in first person, so I kind of doubted anyone would be interested in it. However, writing in first person tends to help my muse so I add to it when I need help. Now, it's getting to the point where it could actually become a multi-chapter fic, so I decided to post the first part of Chapter One for a response. If it does interest, please let me know. I'm a lot more comfortable writing in first person, so if I get positive feedback, I may have a few more ideas for other stories I've avoided writing because of my reader quirk.

If you're fine with this POV, please let me know. If you're interested in this story in particular, I have to warn you that this first piece is **only **because I want your opinion (whether a review or PM, I don't care) So any other chapters for this one won't be posted until I'm completely certain it's ready for that.

Okay, thanks for reading! Hope you enjoy :)

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**Chapter One**

Walking into the Barracks, the men and woman I worked with daily - Corporals and Lieutenants alike - were there to greet me with their boisterous applause, a celebration underway in honour of my promotion to Knight-Captain.

It had been three years since I awoke in the village tavern, extremely confused about my strange surroundings. I don't know what happened, or why and quite frankly, I'm still not sure that I care. The terror that had plagued me upon waking, faded quickly with the realisation I had been given a fresh start; this miracle as I often called it, had come at the most opportune time and whether it was fate or fortune, I was going to appreciate it for as long as possible.

"Finally got to meet Her Majesty." My fascination for the Queen had become an often tapped source of amusement among those I had grown close to, the Knight-Commander in particular seemed to relish each and every chance he had to tease me about it. "So.. how was it?"

Despite knowing my own words would one day come back to haunt me, I couldn't seem to help myself as I blurted out the experience. "Weird.. and.. wonderful. Gods that scar above her lip, of which you never once mentioned by the way." The glare I directed at him transformed into a triumphant smirk when a sudden bout of choking followed his amused snort.

The sound caused those in the vicinity to throw worried glances our way, but the smile curling my lips seemed to reassure them and they all eventually went back to their talking and drinking.

As he composed himself, I continued since I had known him long enough to know he'd pursue the topic until he had squeezed every drop of future humiliation from me. While embellishing my tales is a common occurrence, I didn't feel the need this time as the events that unfolded in the throne room slipped from my lips.

xxx

"Three years I have unknowingly paid a complete stranger for her exemplary services. Her accomplishments since she arrived here could fill more books than any one of us could fill in the span of our entire lives."

"Rise, Lady Swan and remove your helm." When I complied with the request, our eyes connected and there was an unmistakable hunger in those inky brown depths. The shiver that passed through me only intensified when the melodic, somewhat dark laugh escaped her perfect lips.

"I cannot say what I am in awe of more- the multitude of heroic deeds or your strikingly good looks." Another chuckle accompanied her words and I couldn't help the blush that warmed my cheeks. While such a comment from most would garner nothing more than a glare - knowing they were probably only trying to get in my pants - hearing it from the woman famed across the realm for her beauty was undeniably different.

Remaining silent, I bowed my head and lowered my gaze to the floor, surprised when a finger suddenly pressed the underside of my chin and raised them once more. "Your respect is noted, but I would rather see those eyes of yours."

Her finger slid from my chin to my throat and around to the back of my neck as she circled me, a tingling sensation trailing in its wake. Using every ounce of my willpower, I managed to resist turning and following her. "Do you think anyone would find it petty if I were to throw Knight-Commander Graham in the dungeon for hiding you from me all this time?"

I assumed the question was rhetorical, but the lack of response seemed to annoy her. "I asked you a question, Swan."

Of course I thought it would be petty and I had no doubt others would think so, but I wasn't stupid and I certainly wasn't going to tell her that. "No one would dare insult you so, my Queen."

"Tsk." The heat from the back of my armour alerted me to the fact I now had the Queen pressed up against me and although I couldn't feel it through the plate, just the thought had my heart rate spiking. "What sort of answer is that?"

I scanned the throne room, meeting the eyes of all those present that the Queen seemed content to ignore for now as her focus remained on me. The fact none of them seemed bothered by the scene concerned me less than it probably should have, distracted by the closeness of the Queen as I was. "It is the answer of a woman who is capable of using her brain and not inclined to be removed from your more favourable.. attentions." I paused as the warmth of her breath caressed my neck, the aforementioned brain short-circuiting at the feeling before I choked out a belated, "My Queen."

"Loyal, brave, gorgeous and intelligent. My my, aren't you a catch." My eyes widened with each word as she practically purred them in to my ear.

Her hand clasped me by the shoulder, a slight pressure applied as she stepped back and raised her voice. "Kneel, Knight-Sergeant."

I did so, without hesitation.

"For your courageous actions over the past three years, the recent rescue of my son Prince Henry and your continued service to the Crown, I hereby grant you the rank of Knight-Captain and award you access to the left-wing of the palace where you will be taking up residence." While I had expected the promotion, it was a well-known fact that none of the Guard stayed within the Palace, at least not beyond the required security duty. It was for this reason that I gasped before I could stop myself, and a smirk curled the Queen's lips at my obvious shock.

xxx

Graham shook his head and laughed. "Well that was anti-climatic."

I had to laugh with him because honestly, he was right. There were so many emotions vying for my attention during the time, but the frustration that came when Regina had sauntered from the throne room had definitely been far more potent than any of the others. "Speaking of, is that normal? The way she acted I mean."

"No.." His brow furrowed in the way it does when he's thinking, so I knew he wasn't finished. "It's not exactly abnormal either."

The disappointment must have shown on my face because his eyes softened and there was a faint smile on his lips. "You misunderstand me. The Queen often displays.. peculiar behaviour. She does as she pleases and doesn't take into account how her actions affect other people."

I nodded my understanding and grinned. "I get it. Though, I think you might be confused about that last part, she knew the exact effect she was having on me."

He laughed again and gave his own nod. "You may be right about that."

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**I know, it IS short and that's because I went back to the chapter and edited this part only so that I could post. Draft wise, the chapter is longer but this is all I edited. Think of it as a preview, the next part can be merged with chapter two so.. meh. Is it interesting? Does the lack of third person bother you? Want me to post more when I've polished what I have? **


	2. Reward of Duty

**I am having trouble starting Chapter 23 for LWC, it'll be a while before that's updated. I figured I'd throw this up as an apology.**

* * *

"Emma! Shit, Emma! Wake up!"

I have never been someone who responds well to my sleep being interrupted and Graham has been on the receiving end of my anger enough times to know this, so it didn't take much to convince myself that what happened was his own fault.

Turning his back to me so I could throw on some clothes, he tried to explain the reason behind his lapse in common sense, the hand covering his face made it difficult to understand many of the words. I think I heard something about a revolt in there somewhere, which I admit would be a pretty good reason to risk the ire of your second-in-command.

Thinking it wouldn't do any good if he walked into the wall and knocked himself unconscious, I lead him from the room with a hand on his back, all the while muttering about, "Bloody peasants."

"My sentiments exactly, Captain." I came to a stop at the sound of the Queen's voice, catching sight of her a moment later as she rounded the corridor. When she came to stand before us, her eyes landed on Graham and she frowned. "Why is the Commander bleeding all over the place?"

It continuously amazed me how other people could gather their thoughts with her in their presence, this time being no different when Graham smoothly dismissed her concern before I had even thought of a way to explain. "My fault, Majesty. I failed to remember that waking the Captain had... consequences."

She tilted her head to the side, a smirk playing across her lips that made the meaning of her next words perfectly clear.

"Perhaps you need to work on your technique." What little was left of my brain cells after only two hours of sleep quickly vanished into thin air. The only thing I could manage at that point was a blush, which I evidently failed to hide because her smirk had become positively evil.

Knowing the moment would end eventually, I fought off the disappointment when it did, the smirk slowly sliding away as her face became stoic once more. "Commander, I'm being informed by the general populace that my guards have ignored their pleas for help finding their missing children."

As far as I knew, no one had come forward with any complaints, so this was news to me. After a brief glance in his direction, I knew his thoughts were similar to my own by the blank look on his face. "Majesty, I had heard nothing about this until a few minutes ago."

"Then I suggest you and the Captain here find out what is going on, I expect a full report when you're done." As she turned to walk away, she paused and then added. "And bring me the guard responsible for causing all of this with their incompetence."

* * *

Wandering around the Town Square, I scanned the crowd gathered, looking for a particular face and trying my best to ignore the angry glares people seemed to consider necessary to throw at me. The thoughts that went through my mind as I passed them had me cringing, the worst being the idea to suggest these people take responsibility for neglecting their sons and daughters long enough for someone to take them. I guess I wasn't ignoring them as successfully as I would have liked, but it's not as though I was the one that had stolen their children and quite frankly, being constantly stared at was annoying.

Intent on marching my way to the Tavern where the person I sought likely I was, I sighed and spun on my heel, only to stumble back as I collided into her.

"Damn it, Red! Where the hell have you been?"

"I've followed you for the past five minutes, wondering when you'd notice." Her teeth bared with the wolfish grin that I found slightly unnerving, even after finding out her well-kept secret.

There were times when the woman drove me insane, if you thought a werewolf would be the type of person to take things more seriously, Ruby would soon prove you wrong. I often have to resist lashing out at her, some times in exasperation, others in anger. Right now, it was a healthy mix of both.

"In case you haven't noticed, I'm having a slight problem at the moment and I would really appreciate less immaturity and more helpfulness."

"Alright, Captain Crankypants- How may I be of service?" I rolled my eyes at the mock bow and ignored the sarcasm entirely.

"You could start by telling me what you've heard."

"No more than you have, I imagine. Someone has been sneaking into the village and luring kids away, no one seems to know why." She shrugged.

Having grown up in another world, there were plenty of reasons that ran through my mind at what someone could want with them and none of them raised my hopes that we would find any of them unharmed or even alive.

"I don't suppose you could use your.." I closed my mouth at the frantic look that crossed her face.

It took longer than it should have before the fact I had almost let slip her condition dawned on me, which made me feel like an idiot considering we're surrounded by half of the town, a town that was already in a mass state of panic. "I'm sorry, Red."

I'm not sure how I looked to anyone who saw me, the stinging sensation in my eyes would have me hazarding a guess they were likely bloodshot and I could feel the oncoming headache; the lack of sleep was clearly getting to me and my frustration at the lack of progress wasn't helping matters.

"Don't worry about it. To answer the question, I should be able to help but I'll need a few hours." Relief and perhaps a little hope filled me at the tone of confidence her words held, she had helped me in the past so I knew I could rely on her.

After telling her she had all the time she needed, I then decided to take care of the other request (demand) from the Queen.

xxx

Roughly two hours had passed before I managed to find someone willing to talk to me about the complaints we had heard nothing about, another fifteen minutes or so - with the help of the first - to find others willing to corroborate his story.

It was with this newly acquired information that I entered the Sleeping Quarters of the Barracks and pulled Knight-Corporal West from his bunk, dragging him toward the palace without acknowledging his protests or his questions.

He had struggled initially and even managed to escape, only for me to catch him seconds later- a testament to the perils of neglect and plain laziness. He was so out of shape, it would have embarrassed me if I had failed. The fact my speed is so well-known among the Guard, meant a clear lack of intelligence on his part.

Entering the throne room, I immediately caught sight of the bored looking Queen as she sat regally upon her throne, her eyes snapped to mine as I pulled West along behind me.

"Ah, my Captain- have you brought me a present?"

After one of the guards by the door had taken over restraining the Corporal, I stepped forward and kneeled at her feet, bowing my head as I addressed her. "I have brought what you asked for. Whether you believe him a gift is up to you, my Queen."

"Rest assured, if he is the one you say he is, then he is most definitely a gift." The sound of shuffling met my ears a moment before a hand grasped my chin and pulled me to my feet.

Her eyes studied me and I had to resist dropping my own to look at the scar that marred her perfect lip, swallowing the lump in my throat upon realising the proximity of our bodies.

"I'm feeling unusually generous, Captain." My breath hitched when she moved the hand from my chin to clasp the back of my neck, her eyes snapping to my lips as she spoke. "How would you like a reward for your services?"

"My duty to you is its own reward, my Queen." I wanted to beat myself over the head as the words came forth automatically, inwardly groaning at the mischievous way she grinned.

"Very well, Captain. Return to your room and get some sleep, I need the only useful person under my command well-rested if I hope to end this nonsense with the peasants."

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**A/N: I know you all have a ton of questions about the direction of this story, as well as events that took place before the beginning and I promise everything (that I think needs addressing) will be in upcoming chapters. I do in fact have a few scenes written already regarding questions I've received so far, but some of them won't appear for a while.**

**I do have a question of my own though for you guys, I would like to write a chapter detailing how Emma ended up in the Enchanted Forest. My question is, do you care how I do it? Do you prefer past events occurring in dream scenes, in thoughts or maybe you'd be fine with me having her talk about it with someone?**

**Let me know, as always I don't mind answers in a PM if you're not planning to leave a review. If you're a Guest, but you have Tumblr you can send me an ask or mail there, link is in my profile.**


	3. Resurfacing of the Past

Nothing but darkness greeted me when I woke that night, something had pulled me from my sleep prematurely. That was always the way it went, always when I'm unconscious. I don't know why, maybe I have to be that way for it to work or maybe it was just terrible timing. When it came down to it, it never really mattered, all that did matter was knowing my time was limited before they found me.

While I packed my belongings - meaning a few clothes and essential hygiene products - into a ratty duffel bag; I admit I was curious about how they planned to capture me this time. Variety was not something these people lacked, that was for sure. I don't think they've ever used the same trick twice, some attempts were just plain awful, as if they weren't even trying. Like the time I managed to avoid them for nearly a year before someone came around claiming to know my roommate. I didn't have one, not that I discouraged the idea that I did. But it was nothing more than a product of my imagination, it paid to lie about certain things when you were being hunted. That was just one of many, the handful they had used that actually worked counted far less than those that failed.

My reprieve this time around had lasted longer than the others, it would have been two years since I ditched my identity as Laura Brandon and became Emma Swan. It was a shame that I would have to change it once more, I was rather fond of her life. All the careers I've had so far, bounty hunter - or bail bonds person - if you want to be anal about it - was definitely one of the coolest. I missed being a blonde too and the long hair- which I was going to have to cut again. Aside from being on the run all the time, I don't think I hated anything more than short hair. With my bone structure, it made me look like a man who was trying too hard to look like a woman.

Sighing, I glanced around my apartment one more time before shutting the door and jogging downstairs to the lobby. It would probably make more sense if I went out the fire escape, but the feeling wasn't as intense as it would have been if they were too close. This time, I wouldn't spend my first few months as someone else, wracked with guilt because that stupid moral compass of mine has a problem with me abandoning everything to save myself.

"Shouldn't you be in bed?" Lou sat where he always sat, behind his little desk, frowning at people and pretending he hated the world as much as he was supposed to.

"Yeah, probably." I stood off to the side, keeping my eyes on the entrance and back to the stairwell- It might have looked odd, but I didn't care. I've learned to trust that feeling over the years, but caution has never been a bad thing and more options for an exit were always better than less. "I need to skip town and I can't give you any notice, what's it going to cost me?"

He shrugged, not bothered by my behaviour in the least. "Most people don't announce they're skipping town and offer to pay off their landlords beforehand."

Grinning, I mimicked his shrug. "I have priorities." And a ridiculously stupid conscience. "Notice is two weeks, right? How 'bout I pay you three and then we can get to making out before the teary-eyed goodbyes."

He cracked a smile then, which would have shocked anyone who thought they knew the guy. He pretended to be serious and mad all the time, but once you got to know him, he was hilarious and strangely sweet. "I'll settle for the two and pass on the making out. It wouldn't be right if my wife had to go to prison because I couldn't resist those hot lips of yours." There was a moment of pause before he added. "Besides, she likes you for some reason."

Laughing, I shook my head and tossed an envelope with a wad of cash in front of him. "There's more than enough in there, use some of it to take her out one night, maybe it'll help her get over losing her chance with me." I winked at him and turned to leave, waving over my shoulder as I walked out into the cold night air.

xxx

It had been a while since I'd thought about my time in the other world, let alone dreamed about it. There is something, in this room or in the palace, I don't know; it's been messing with my mind. The dreams, the thoughts - hell - even the feelings stopped existing for me over a year ago. I've gotten, or at least thought I'd gotten used to being here. I had accepted that my life in that world was over, that I could finally be free.

Most people thought I moved all the time because I had problems settling, that I prefered to keep my distance, that I liked the drunken one night stands. It wasn't true, any of it. I wanted to belong somewhere, I wanted to stop having to run all the time, I was done with meaningless flings and I wanted to find someone to commit to. I couldn't blame people for what they thought, of course. No one knew that there were people after me, trying to catch me so they could study me in a lab somewhere like some sort of mutant.

Three years, it's the longest I've ever spent in one place. The dream, the memory, that's the last of them from back then. That was the night I ceased to exist, I was okay with that.

I like being Emma Swan.

* * *

I was sitting on the bed in my room, lacing my boots when the door swung open and Red entered carrying a stuffed toy. "I came by earlier, but Regina informed me that waking you is a very bad idea."

Was it weird to feel the surge of warmth that went through me? After all it's not as though the Queen were looking out for my well-being and making sure I got enough sleep. Considering what happened to Graham, it was more than likely she were saving Red from the same fate.

Pushing away the feeling, I chuckled and shook my head. "You should probably thank her for that."

"I saw Graham a little after that, I'm not sure I want to experience having my nose reset, it looks painful." She opened her mouth again, as though she had more to say so I waited.

And waited.

The silence stretched to the point where it bordered uncomfortable, so I was surprised when she finally spoke. "Doesn't it bother you?"

With no idea what she was talking about, I blinked and said the only thing I could. "What?" She motioned toward the mirror, as if that was meant to help. "Did it do something I wasn't aware of?"

Comprehension dawned on her face and considering we were sitting so close, I distinctly heard the expletive she muttered under her breath before she started rambling. "I didn't know you didn't know and oh she is going to kill me if she finds out I told you."

It had all been said so fast and when she stood up, I instinctively grabbed her by the arm and yanked her back down. "Too late to back out now, what are you talking about?"

"Everyone knows, or at least I thought everyone did. Maybe she thought so too?" I shrugged at the hopeful look she threw me, still waiting for an explanation. "She has magic." I already knew that, so I nodded for her to continue. "Right, she uh.."

Not wanting to sit here all day, I interrupted. "She can do something involving mirrors, can she come through them or something?"

"No no." She titled her head before shrugging. "Maybe, I don't know. I do know though, that she can use them to see and hear things in the room the mirror is in."

"Huh. So, she could be listening in now and know that you've told me?" I barely contained my laugh at the look of shock on her face.

While I assumed the Queen had better things to do, the panic was still present when I stood from the bed and I kind of felt bad for putting it there, so I figured it wouldn't hurt to at least try to help. "If she is listening, she should also know it was completely accidental and were anything to happen to you because of it, I might just get upset about being spied on." Although I doubted it would sway the Queen against doing something if she were angered, it was the thought that counted, right? Either way, I didn't mind much about the mirror, having eyes on me all the time wasn't exactly a new concept for me.

Her entire face transformed then, like someone had just shoved an instant happiness pill down her throat. I guess she thought more of my influence than I did, weird. "Thanks.. Um, I found something."

"The missing kids?" She nodded. "You found them?"

"No, but I got one of the parents to talk to me and she gave me something of her daughters that might help me track her." She waved the toy in her hand that I had completely forgotten to ask about earlier.

"Wouldn't it be better if we did this at night? It's easier for you if you can fur it up, right?" It had taken me awhile to be able to trust her when she was a werewolf - which seemed perfectly reasonable when one considers the fact she nearly tore my arm off the first time - but once I did, she had taught me a lot about werewolves since then. She's also scolded me many times for referring to shifting as furring it up, something she no doubt wanted to do again if I paid attention to the look she was giving me,

I didn't.

* * *

**A/N: **I'm betting absolutely none of this made anyone any less curious about her past, did it?


	4. Not a Question of Loyalty

**Author Note: **I'm just going to go ahead and let you all know that there are implied mentions of torture, drug use and a bit of violence. Least important of all; there is also a flashback at the end.

I don't believe I have yet thanked you all for the follows/favourites and positive reviews, so let's just get that out of the way ;) Thank you!

* * *

Ruby and I parted ways once we decided to meet at the edge of the forest later that afternoon, so naturally I did what I usually would around this time and resumed my duty as one of the Guard. The lack of people I encountered in what was generally a bustling part of the village was disconcerting, especially when I had expected the crowd from earlier in the morning, baying for blood as due for the missing children.

What I did not expect was finding that crowd huddled within the market, surrounding the executioners platform, nor the Queen standing before a man whose face was yet within my view; though I had a fair idea of who to expect as such a physique was - regrettably - hard to ignore.

Seeing a familiar face, I pushed through the throng of villagers until I stood beside him and nudged him with my elbow. "What's going on?"

His eyes flashed with excitement when he turned his head to me with a grin. "Her Majesty is entertaining her subjects, love."

Bile rose in my throat with the realisation of what that meant and while I had often heard of the Queens "entertainment" I had never seen it and had no desire to do so now but as I made to leave, he grabbed me by the arm. "You claim allegiance, Captain and she has already seen you, I would stay and pretend to enjoy the show if I were you."

Yanking my arm from his grip, I snarled. "Well I'm not you, Killian and I'd appreciate it if you kept your hands to yourself." Clenching my jaw, I glanced toward the platform to confirm the Queen had indeed seen me before I turned abruptly on my heel and left the square.

The cheers I could hear from behind me as I walked away made my head spin, I would never be able to understand the sick pleasure people got watching someone else be tortured.

It was the challenge in her eyes that made the decision even easier for me than it would have been otherwise, and when the static sensation across the back of my neck was accompanied by the bone chilling scream of a certain former Corporal, I knew she wasn't happy with my departure.

Whatever punishment I had to face for my choice would be worth it, if the alternative was being witness to the Queen's cruelty.

xxx

"I was wondering where you disappeared to." I jumped at the sound of her voice from behind me, only barely managing to suppress the expletive on the tip of my tongue as I turned to face her before falling to my knees. I may not agree with her methods or even understand them, but she was still the Queen and I, her Guard Captain.

I bowed my head with a murmured, "My Queen." and waited.

As she circled me, it brought to mind how a zebra might feel when being appraised by a lion the moment before it sinks its teeth into its neck. I had to bite my lip to stop myself from laughing, the thought wasn't far off how I was feeling. "Tell me, why did you leave the market place?"

Inwardly, I sighed as my eyes closed and I tensed in preparation for her reaction to my words. "I cannot abide torture."

Suddenly her fingers were in my hair, pulling my head back and forcing me to meet her gaze as my eyes snapped open to see her leaning down with a snarl. My immediate response to being handled in such a way was anger, to force myself from the ground, to look her in the eyes and snarl right back- but I had spent three years being trained, conditioned to show respect, that the Queen's will is Law and that that law was never to be questioned, never challenged and if one failed to remember that, then their life would be forfeit. To all outside appearances, my expression remained impassive and while I had no doubt she knew of the anger I was feeling, the visible swallow I took upon realising my life was very much at risk- had her lips curling into a smirk.

"Are you telling me that your little slight against me was brought on by your own weakness? That your comfort is more important to you than my will? Do you think yourself superior?" I flinched as the last word was punctuated with a less-than gentle tug of my hair.

"No."

Another tug. "To which question, Captain? Be more specific."

"All of them, my Queen."

"Then why, pray tell, did you think it acceptable to leave?"

"Because I could." It was stupid, it was ultimately the worst possible thing I could have said. When the electric heat entered my body through the hand still clenched in my hair, I sorely wished I hadn't as I concentrated all my willpower into not releasing the scream that tore at my throat.

Words were murmured in my ear, her tone angry and demanding as she commanded me to release what was rightfully hers, what she was earning, what I owed her for walking away.

By the time she was the one to give in, it felt as though every muscle in my body was on fire. My stubborn refusal to relent, to give her what she wanted was paid for with the pain of having kept my jaw clenched so tightly I wouldn't be surprised if I'd done lasting damage.

And just when the thought she was done came, it disappeared as I was flung through the air by some unseen assailant. I tried to brace myself for impact, knowing the stable wall behind me would hurt the moment I hit it and it did. The force with which my back met wood was enough to completely knock the wind from my lungs, I could feel the process of at least one of my ribs breaking and while it hurt enough for that scream to finally be vocalized, I didn't possess the breath to do so.

"Is your pride truly worth this much, Captain?"

It was only when I raised my head to hear her words that I realised I had yet to slump to the ground as I should have, and it was then that I experienced the true fear for my life. This was too familiar, the pain, the loss of control, the forced submission. Panic widened my eyes and despite the reasoning trying to be heard from my mind, my body struggled against the bonds that bound me and prevented the use of my limbs.

* * *

"Hold her down." I squeezed my eyes shut, my arms and legs flailing in an attempt to keep them from sedating me. My instinct had failed me, I wasn't supposed to be caught. There was meant to be plenty of time for me to evade them, this shouldn't be happening.

I could feel the needle sinking into my skin and I screamed, still struggling against the hands pinning my ankles and wrists to the bed. Haven't I been through enough? Was my childhood not one of the worst? Why was there always someone trying to hurt me? Didn't I deserve better? better than a lifetime of endless pain and suffering.

It was an accident, an anomaly that couldn't be explained, that's what they said. So why, why did it feel like I was being punished for her death? She was a bully, she had tormented me for months. I was a kid, fifteen fucking years old. No one had ever taken care of me, no one cared what I went through. The foster parents I was with at the time were more interested in their drugs, I was malnourished and weak, it made me a target and I was sick of it.

One minute she was sneering down at me, threatening me and the next, a light- faint but visible from where I lay. It was coming from me, I don't know what it was but the sneer-turned-grimace now on her face made it obvious it wasn't something I needed to be afraid of.

Yet I was, in fact I still am. I felt like a mutant, the family I was with sent me back and then _they_ kidnapped me. Two years I spent in this hellhole before that same light saved me once again, two years of tests and now it was about to happen all over again.

The last thought I had before sleep consumed me was that I just wanted to go _home_.


	5. Moving Beyond the Walls

Hushed whispers floated through the room, back and forth seemingly gaining urgency as the quiet conversation wore on. I had no idea what they were saying, nor who exactly they were. I hadn't opened my eyes yet, I was comfortable enough, if we were to exclude the splitting headache and slight pang in my side. Honestly, I just wanted to go back to sleep after being woken by people who thought they were being quiet.

Then I remembered I was supposed to be meeting Red and my eyes opened in panic before I sat up, a move my body immediately reprimanded me for in the form of the worst damn pain of my life. "Mother.. fucker."

"Lady Swan?" Holding my side, I glanced toward the voice and all of a sudden I was being pushed back down on the bed by a woman who had to be at least three hundred years old.

Alright, maybe that was a slight exaggeration, but definitely not by much.

"You're not to move, miss." I'm not sure if she was trying to scold me with the look she gave, or if she were appraising me as tomorrow nights appetizer. Either way, I wasn't given much time to ponder it when - seconds later - the Queen in all her glory swooped into the room and did a far better job of pinning me to the bed with her eyes.

"That will be all, Bertha." I don't think I've ever snorted and I have no idea why I found it so funny, but the laughter came before I could even think to stop it and the glare I got from both women did nothing to dampen my amusement. Unfortunately, this reaction was even worse than the mere act of sitting up, so the worst pain of my life just upgraded and I was stuck sucking in a breath and almost suffocating myself in trying to hold back a string of extremely inappropriate words.

"Your Majesty, if she doesn't calm down she's going to.." Regina set her glare upon the older woman, effectively silencing whatever she was about to say as she limped from the room.

"You have three broken ribs, a concussion and an unhealthy amount of magic in your system. I'd recommend less movement and more sleep, unless you wish to remain in that bed for the foreseeable future." As she talked, she moved into the room and closed the door behind her. By the time she was done speaking, she stood with her back to me as she looked out of the only window of my room.

"Well I guess I now know what happens when I forget my place." I bit my tongue as soon as the words were out of my mouth and silently prayed she would ignore me entirely. I don't know what had come over me, I wasn't generally so outspoken in her presence.

Her shoulders noticeably slumped before she turned around. "It would seem our magics aren't all that fond of each other." I opened my mouth to protest the fact I even had magic, only to be silenced with a wave of her hand. "There's no point in denying it, I assumed your concussion means you may have forgotten a few things. What is the last thing you remember?"

That was easy. "You throwing me against the wall and holding me there."

She inclined her head. "There wasn't much beyond that point, but it seems you don't remember screaming obscenities at me and then breaking free of my hold, right before you collapsed- hence the concussion." Great. Not only did I insult the Queen, but the one thing I didn't want anyone to know of was no longer an option.

"Each day I find myself even more curious than the last." Were I not bed ridden, a statement like that probably would have sent me running. Conceding to the fact that wasn't an option either, I merely hummed my acknowledgement to indicate I wasn't ignoring her.

"What was it that made you snap back there at the stables, hmm?"

I sighed and closed my eyes. "You assumed my inability to abide torture came from the fact I was weak, like I see myself as some sort of good person who's against it simply because it's immoral."

"I have the distinct feeling you're about to tell me I was wrong."

Feigning a gasp, I placed my hand against my chest. "My Queen, I would never." While I couldn't see her expression, I heard her growl before I felt the bed dip beside me. "You were merely uninformed, I'm not much for sharing things about myself."

I cracked my eyes open when her hand brushed against my forehead, but when a tingling began to spread beneath my skin, I jerked away and received a frustrated sigh in return. "I am well aware that your current condition is my doing but I only wish to ease the pain, I never..." she stopped abruptly, her eyes hardening as she stood and moved to leave.

It was only as she reached forth to open the door that I realised I didn't want her to, so I did the only thing I could think of and answered her question. "Where I'm from, magic isn't meant to exist."

Seeing that it was enough to stop her movement, I carried on. "I had a flashback in the stables and the experiences I've had because of this.. abnormality has left its fair share of scars."

I paused and waited for her to turn back to me because I wanted her to know, to see the truth in what I had to say next. Regardless of how spectacularly shit the current situation was, I would still choose it over the life I previously had. "When I walked away, it wasn't from you, it was from being reminded of the two worst years of my life. My last memory of where I'm from, is being held down while I was injected with a drug that would put me to sleep so they could run experiments on me without having to listen to my screams."

All at once her expression of indifference fell away, revealing something warm, something that looked a lot like empathy as she returned to the bed. When she reached out her hand this time, rather than flinch- I leaned into it. I welcomed her magic as it flowed through me and I immediately felt the difference as the throb at my temple lessened significantly while the pain in my side almost ceased to exist altogether.

Even after the magic stopped, her hand remained where it was and her fingers stroked my forehead soothingly. "I mentioned earlier that our magic didn't like each other, what I was going to say just then was that I never intended to harm you in the way that I did. Your magic seems to be instinctual so that when you subconsciously went to protect yourself, you ended up fuelling my magic instead."

As I thought about her words, my gaze wandered to the window where I noticed the quickening of darkness. I frowned when I remembered Red once more, wondering how the hell I was meant to meet her now.

Fingers trailed the line of my brow, as though she meant to smooth the skin that crinkled with my thoughts. "What's wrong?"

"Red."

The light strokes ceased. "Red?"

Unsure of the reason for the slight hitch in her voice, I chose to ignore it and explain. "I was supposed to meet her in the forest once night fell."

"Well, feel free to try and leave your bed." My eyes snapped to hers at the sound of the bite in her voice and my brow creased further in my confusion as to why.

"She has a possible way to find the children, I was going with her to look for them."

"Oh." I must have been seeing things because - if not - the way her eyes changed made me think she was relieved. Which would imply that my being anywhere near Red in anything other than a working capacity, bothered the Queen and I'm not sure how I was supposed to take that.

Standing, she walked over to the mirror that Red had drawn my attention to earlier this morning and I watched as swirls of blue danced within the glass before a face appeared. "Do you have someone in mind that could replace you?"

She had to repeat the question before I realised she had even said anything. Shaking the fog from my head, I answered. "Sorry, yeah. Graham should suffice, she'll be waiting in the uh.. glade, with that weird.. stream."

I could never remember the names of landmarks, so it was a relieved sigh I gave when she realised where I meant and interrupted my floundering to address the creepy ghost in the mirror. "Find the Knight-Commander and tell him he is to meet Red in the Lunar Grove and he is to make sure she knows he's stepping in for the Knight-Captain as per her request."

* * *

**A/N: **The muse didn't care that updating this again was interrupting my routine of posting a chapter for each story before coming full circle, I'm just going with the flow.


	6. A Web of Lies

**Author Note: **You're not imagining things, this _is_ the third chapter for this story and yes, it _has_ made me neglect the others. Shame on me.

* * *

Over the period of a week, I found myself meeting a variety of servants that found themselves attending to my every whim. Naturally I wasn't given any say in the matter, but I allowed them to bring me my meals and help me bathe and then - regardless of their protests - I thanked them for their assistance and dismissed them.

At first, it had been Bertha who fussed over me and yes, I giggled every single time I heard her name. She would ramble on at me about nothing while prodding me in the ribs, then scold me as though I were an insolent child and not a human being who didn't like their injuries being touched constantly and without care - that lasted for all of two days before she disappeared and Regina replaced her.

I admit I was a little curious as to her whereabouts, maybe the Queen put everyone out of their misery and removed whatever spell was on the woman that was keeping her decrepit arse alive for so long. Whatever the case, Regina's idea of helping me heal was far more preferable. She didn't ask if something hurt after poking the area and then yell at me for whining, though she has rolled her eyes a few times.

Whenever she appeared, she enquired about how I was feeling and then dose me with an appropriate amount of magic to remove any significant pain I was in. Afterwards, she stayed awhile to talk before she excused herself with some muttered utterance about having things to do. The entire process occurred twice a day, always around the same time.

Red came to visit me once or twice and Regina would always be conspicuously absent, delaying when she arrived for reasons unknown. I suppose I could have assumed but then if I were wrong, it would probably lead to me making an arse of myself - which I've already done quite enough of - and it wasn't my business really, so I certainly wasn't going to ask.

After shoving my curiosity to the back of my mind, I tried asking Red about her progress in finding the missing children, but all I received in response was avoidance and we somehow ended up talking about random, insignificant things that really would bore me to sleep if I had to repeat them. Of course I didn't put up with that for very long and when I finally snapped, I was firmly informed by Regina the next time she came by that I was to cease worrying about anything that didn't involve my health. Which just lead me to think they were keeping something from me and so now I spent my time worrying about why they were avoiding each other while ignoring my questions, only to double team me and warn me off asking about what had supposedly been my job before my unfortunate accident. All things considered, I was probably right to be paranoid but it wasn't like I could really do anything about it while stuck in bed, so I eventually did as told and let it drop; at least for now.

Ah yes my accident, that was what we were going to let everyone - those curious enough to ask - believe and as long as Regina kept her promise, I was perfectly content to go along with it. Honestly I half-expected her to drag me off to the square and use me as an example for anyone who even thought of disobeying her, instead I was given a promise that no one else would know of my magic all the while receiving her personal attention.

It did make me wonder if people might question my mental health were my easy acceptance of the situation found out somehow, then again what did I really have to complain about? Any pain I felt was brief, soothed the moment she checked in on me. I'm bed ridden, but the alternative was, what? Patrol a village to protect people who don't even trust me to do so? Wander through a forest at night with a werewolf trying to find the tracks of some freak that has gotten a taste for kidnapping? There were plenty more guards and as far as I know, Graham and Red were taking care of the latter. When it comes down to the bare truth of the matter, being injured is a small holiday from the tedious, unappreciated routine that is my life. Maybe they would only wonder because she should scare me, but if I were the kind of person to let fear control me, I doubt I would even still be alive let alone be in the position that I am now.

Or maybe I'm making excuses and ignoring a perfectly valid reason to want nothing to do with her because it's what I'm meant to do? I didn't spend six months in complete isolation learning the law for nothing, Graham and the other guards warned me about the woman I was swearing my life to and yet here I am, proud of the fact I am her Knight-Captain.

Perhaps I'm simply mad and with growing up how I did, who could blame me if I were?

"Are you even listening to me?" Oh right, Red was visiting again.

Sheepishly, I rubbed the back of my head and shrugged. "Sorry, must have phased out."

She rolled her eyes. "Gee, thanks for being interested."

"Seriously? I don't need to know about the weird noises you hear coming from the upper floor of the tavern." I scrunched my face at the images that followed, I really didn't want to picture the kind of people who ventured into that place; in compromising positions.

She glared at me and I admit, it was sort of intimidating. I mean, it's not often you see a persons eyes change colour and the fact she was a werewolf? Contrary to my idiotic behaviour as of late, I'm not completely stupid. So I was thankful when she stopped and deigned to respond. "I mentioned that at least fifteen minutes ago."

Understanding just how deserved her ire was didn't get in the way of my laughing, which I suppose makes my statement regarding my intellect somewhat questionable.

"You're a real dick some times."

With a grin and the slight incline of my head, I agreed with the assessment. "You're not the first to tell me that."

"I can believe that."

We elapsed into a blissful silence for a few minutes before she launched back into her one-sided conversation; where I assume she left off last time. I felt obligated to stare at her like she had three heads, even though I was actually paying attention to her ramblings this time. She was describing another of her pointless dates with some guy who had been far too optimistic in the first place, if you asked me - everyone knows Red loves the ladies.

"Hey, can I ask you something?"

Relieved she cut the story short but resenting the fact I had to hear about it at all, I responded as any respectable five-year old would. "You just did."

I saw the fake, unamused laugh coming from a mile away. "Ha ha."

Sitting there, I waited for her to continue only to realise after a minute or two - during which occurred a weirdly intense staring competition - that she wasn't planning to, so I rolled my eyes and prompted her. "Well, what's the question?"

She blinked before laughing softly and shaking her head, which I thought was curious but was yet another thing I added to the mounting pile of things I forced myself to be ignorant of. "It's about your accident."

"What about it?" The involuntary swallow proved just how unexpected this topic was, and how nervous it made me. I can tell when people lie, but somehow that had never improved my ability to do so.

"Since when do you need riding lessons?"

At least that answer was simple enough. "Since Regina saw the condition I was in after returning from patrol the other night."

"So she just decided she'd show you how to ride properly?"

I sighed. "I'm the Captain of the Guard, it's kind of sad that I don't know how to ride a horse after three years without needing to rest for a week afterwards."

"Right and how exactly did you manage to fall off?"

Regina and I really should have planned this all better, I really do know next to absolutely nothing about horses. I can mount them and I can ride them, anything more and - I really should have someone teach me about them. "I don't know, something spooked the horse. Why are we even talking about this?"

"I ran into Killian, he was asking about you."

"And?" I was mentally kicking myself with that one word, my voice had changed pitch without so much as consulting me. I'm an awful liar, I need to let people know these things the second we meet. _"Hi, I'm Emma and I can't lie worth shit, please never put me in a position where that skill is a requirement and we can totally be friends."_

One look and I knew she'd caught it. "And he mentioned how convenient it was that you got injured after pissing off Regina."

I should have known he'd be the first one to figure out something about the story we gave was suspicious, damn pirate was too smart for his own good. "Yeah well, he needs to stop shit stirring."

"It does sound..."

Frustrated with where this was leading and knowing she wasn't the kind of person to just let something go, I interrupted her. "I don't care how it sounds."

"Emma, I don't know why you're defending her but this.." she gestured where I lay. "This isn't okay."

As bad as I felt for lying to her, it didn't stop me from getting angry with what she was implying. Regina is the one that hurt me, sure but it was an accident. I wasn't some battered housewife who wouldn't leave her abusive partner out of some absurd belief that love would eventually change things for the better. "I'm defending her because you're accusing her of doing something you have no proof of! What the hell is your problem anyway?"

Her expression of concern hardened and it was obvious how much control she was exerting to resist her own anger by the slight strain in her voice. "Caring about my friend is a problem now, is it? Well excuse me for being concerned that you're lying to protect someone who thinks it's okay to break your ribs as a punishment for bruising her ego."

"Again, you're assuming she's the one responsible. I fell off a fucking horse, alright?" I closed my eyes and shook my head, composing myself before calmly adding. "That's it. Killian got into your head and screwed with you, she's been taking care of me and you're being ridiculous."

Just as I finished, the door flew open and Regina walked in. "I think it's time you left."

Red stood from where she sat in the corner of the room and as she moved to leave, she paused before Regina. "You need to tell her the truth before she's too far gone and you end up either breaking her heart or killing her." Without waiting for a reply, she was gone and I was left to stare in confusion at a very pissed looking Queen.


	7. Revealing Truths

**Author Note: **This chapter involves a lot of talking, they won't all be like this but some things are just better revealed in conversation rather than dream scenes and flashbacks.

* * *

For a while, Regina simply stood there staring at me and as much as I wanted to ask about what had just happened, I was more interested in studying her and the extensive range of emotions that had followed Red's departure. Different expressions appeared on her beautiful face, fading only to be replaced by another. One by one, the walls came down to reveal a woman who seemed the exact opposite of someone worthy of a being called the Evil Queen.

When she finally moved, she gestured toward the door that closed a moment later and made herself comfortable beside me. Without a single clue about what to do or say, I chose to lay there in the ever-increasing silence until she decided for the both of us.

"I don't want to tell you."

The words did nothing to dampen my curiosity, in fact they did more to confuse me than anything. I couldn't - wouldn't - force her to tell me anything, she was the Queen for shit sakes. "Then don't."

"You're infuriatingly accommodating."

It didn't seem like much of an insult, but it wasn't really a compliment either and I figured she expected a response, so I said what made sense. "You're the Queen, you're entitled to your secrets."

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see she was shaking her head at me. "My secrets will one day lead to your treason."

That got my attention and while I would have preferred not to move because it still hurt, I didn't feel comfortable laying in bed when it seemed I was about to be part of a serious conversation. I managed to pull myself upright without too much grimacing, though what little there was seemed enough to warrant her concerned scrutiny. "I would sooner lay at your feet and beg for death, than betray you."

Her eyes snapped to mine, searching for something as she spoke, her voice softer now that I had to lean in to hear - and fuck if that didn't hurt just a little bit. "I'm not very good at trusting people."

Having heard all the tales of the Evil Queen from the men and women I served with, from the servants who thought their conversations went unnoticed and from simple villagers who talked a little too freely when intoxicated, I had to admit I was a little proud of the confession. "And yet, unlike the rest of your Guard, you haven't taken my heart. If that is your will, take it."

As amusing as it was to see her shock, laughing would be stupid and counterproductive, so I resisted and waited for her to recover. "You know about that?"

I shrugged. "I've heard stories."

Her eyes narrowed. "And you would submit yourself to that? A life of servitude, of no free will?"

It was truly baffling that she didn't understand that I had done that exact thing when I swore fealty to her. If she ordered me to do something, I would either do it or be killed for disobeying her. Honestly, living without a heart would only make serving her easier. It was that thought that reminded me of something that had been drilled into me since day one, an apt phrase that was likely to offend her perhaps a little less than my own words would. "I have sworn a life of servitude, your will is my will."

"Would you stop quoting your lessons and just.."

Tilting my head at the sound of frustration in her voice, I asked. "Just what?"

She sighed. "Be yourself, say what you think. Stop being my damn Captain and be a person, be Emma."

I did laugh this time and it was strange and mocking in a way that would later cause me to frown when I thought about it, but it was nonetheless deserved. I found it ironic that she wanted me to be the person that was responsible for the situation I was in. "And why would I do that? In the mood to break some more of my bones?"

My heart lurched at the pained look she gave and my mind screamed at me to take it back, to apologise for hurting her but I knew if I did, then nothing would change. Maybe she was right and it was time for me to be myself, was stability and protection really worth sacrificing who I was?

"Th.. it was.."

"An accident?" As much as I wanted to accept what she had said as truth, I couldn't bury my doubts, not when I knew she was keeping secrets from me.

"You don't believe me? You think I wanted to hurt you?"

And God just the sound of her voice then made me feel like a complete arse, this woman beside me was so unlike the Regina I knew that it made me question everything. Rather than the strict, demanding and sometimes downright unstable Queen of stories told to keep small children in line, she was both so much more and so much less in that moment. I heard the shock and confusion and I could only assume that stemmed from the fact that maybe no one had ever questioned her before - but it was the hurt, the fear that I didn't believe her that stood out. Was I someone she considered important, did what I think truly matter, was she simply trying to manipulate me or was this just another side of her?

"Before throwing me against the wall, you were trying to make me scream. You expect me to just believe that the Evil Queen had a change of heart?"

There was another flash of pain before she stood and began to pace the room, I could see the wheels turning in her head as she tried to find her words. Minutes passed where neither of us spoke and by the time she did, my patience had worn thin. "I.."

I had started to think maybe it wasn't that she didn't have the words, but maybe she just couldn't come up with a good enough lie. So rather than letting her continue, I shook my head and interrupted her. "I don't want to believe you did this to me on purpose, so if you were about to lie to me then don't bother."

Anger clouded her eyes when she stopped pacing to look at me but the confidence I had in my assumption being right didn't allow me the option of backing down. My gaze wandered from hers to the door and back again, a silent challenge for her to leave if this was too much. It was what she wanted, she had asked me to be myself and this was who I am, so it was up to her whether she could accept me.

I watched as she glanced over to the door with a frown and when her eyes returned to mine, the anger had dissipated. She was still hesitant, but the slight incline of her head told me she acknowledged my offer and that by returning to the bed, she had made the choice to stay. "I changed my mind."

The words threw me as our conversation seemed to have vanished from my mind entirely, likely it was still trying to process the fact she hadn't set me on fire and taken the opportunity to be done with me. "What?"

She rolled her eyes. "I threw you against the wall because I changed my mind. I still wanted you to scream, but there was a more enjoyable way to get what I wanted."

"Oh." Okay, so I sounded a little more disappointed than I should have considering what had actually happened, but I couldn't help that I had a rather active and vivid imagination - and the thoughts that came to me upon hearing those words were reason enough to be a little distracted from the seriousness of the moment.

"I didn't think you'd resist then."

Our shared attraction wasn't much of a secret, between us or anyone else with eyes that had seen even a small fraction of our interactions, it was obvious. It made an odd kind of sense, I mean I really don't think I would have resisted and something tells me she would have stopped if I had. "So when you stopped.."

"It had nothing to do with your disobedience, I could see all that anger in your eyes and I felt this.. need to unleash it."

As appealing as the thought was, we really needed a change of subject before I re-injured myself and I thought- well, if I was expecting her to trust me then maybe I needed to do a little opening up of my own. "I've been slipping recently."

"What do you mean?"

I smiled at the genuine curiosity I could hear in her voice and while I didn't have much hope for her understanding my problem any better than I did, I explained anyway. "Ever since I moved into this room, bits of the real me have started appearing."

"Perhaps it's because you're more comfortable now and you don't feel the need to pretend any more."

That had occurred to me already, but if that were the case then it should have happened long before now, no there was definitely something about the room or the palace in general, or even Regina herself. "Maybe, but I've been so many people in my life, it doesn't make sense that being this is so difficult."

"This isn't the first time then?"

I hesitated as I wondered how much I should admit to and - for some unknown reason - she seemed to take that as a reason to shift closer to me. I can't explain it, but it relaxed me to the point where I figured it was better to continue. "When I escaped from the people who abducted me the first time, I went on the run and changed my identity, I ended up with a new one every few months."

"So Emma Swan isn't your real name?" The way she asked, it reminded me of one of those kids who would hang on to every word of a story as if it were the most fascinating thing they had ever heard - it made me smile.

"Emma is my original name, but it had been years before I used it again. When I was younger I had this family where the mother had this obsession with comparing the children in her care to different birds, she said I had the heroic heart of a Swan. Little Swan was her nickname for me, at least until she had to give me back."

"Is that why you chose it?"

"Because I have a heroic heart?" Her nod caused me to chuckle and I shook my head. "No, it's more of a reminder, that even the good in life doesn't last long. I suppose the meaning had its appeal to the naïve child in me that hasn't quite learned how to let go of its fancies and act like an adult."

The questions stopped for a while and we both sat quietly in the slowly darkening room, the only sounds were those of the servants that bustled around the palace and the soft clinking metal of armoured guards as they passed by my door on their patrol of the halls. I had started to wonder if I had shared too much, that opening up might not have been the best thing to do and it made me restless.

I must have begun fidgeting at some point because I was startled out of my thoughts when she placed her hand on top of mine, squeezing gently before she frowned at the gesture and pulled away. "Why are you sharing this with me?"

I sighed and leaned my head against the wall, my eyes closing as I replied. "I want you to know you can trust me, even though I think that maybe you already do."

"Oh?"

"There has to be a reason I'm the only guard that still possesses my heart, why you come to check on me twice a day and stay afterwards.." I cracked an eye open to gauge her reaction and the interested gaze staring back at me was a surprise, especially as I had expected denial or even hostility. It was enough - to let slip a secret I had kept to myself for the last three years.

"And why you made sure I was taken care of when you found me that day in the forest."


	8. A Strange Land

**Author Note: **Okay, you wanted some of the past three years, so here it is. The beginning first, of course - I may cover more in the following chapters. How she ended up in the Guard, what her training was like - If you're interested, that is.

* * *

Cold. It was the first thought I had as my mind tried to claw its way back to consciousness. It felt as though I had been buried beneath the snow and as my senses came back to me, the shivers set in and my body began to shake violently. I wanted to open my eyes, try to find out where I was and why I was so god damn cold but just as I was about to, there was a sound - a voice - and it was only then that I realised I was being carried. I hadn't been able to make out what had been said, but it dampened my desire to see and I kept my eyes closed. I wondered if maybe this was another test, another drug injected into me to make me think I was cold. If that was the case, then there was a scientist out there who needed a solid punch to the throat.

"Shhh!" It came out as an agitated hiss - not the kind you gave when you heard something and were trying to listen for it, but the kind where you were actually tired of listening and just wanted some peace and quiet. Clearly whoever it was, wasn't in a very good mood.

The chest my head rested against rumbled and the low growl that followed only seconds later seemed so inhuman, that it almost overcame my sense and forced my eyes open. "Would you stop shushing me?! Do you want her to die? She's freezing!"

"What did you expect? she's been out here for who knows how long in the middle of winter." Well that had to be the sexiest voice I had ever heard. If wherever she was, is where they were taking me then I had no complaints. Except the possible dying part, the first woman had a point if the bone-chilling pain was an indication of the state I was in.

"Can't you do something, poof us to a healer maybe? Incase sh.." Yes, poof me - Wait, healer? Where the fuck was I that people referred to doctors as healers, Sherwood Forest?

"No. I do that and then people will know who I am. We've been over this, the less people who know, the less chance she has of finding out." As the woman spoke, a hand was placed against my head and a warmth spread through my veins, the stinging pain of the cold disappearing entirely as I relaxed in the arms that carried me.

"Who is she?"

"She is the reason I didn't cast the curse." My mind took over at the word 'curse' and I began to carefully test my body for restraints without alerting either of them. I wasn't bound - at least not at the wrists - but when I tried to test the lower half of my body, a familiar pain shot straight through my leg and I knew instantly that running was out of the question. My ankle was broken.

"She.. what? She's Sn..."

The hand returned and the feeling that passed through me was different, still warm but easing more than just the cold. It was as though something was soothing my very soul, my mind clouded as what little strength I possessed drained from my body and the last words I heard floated to the back of my mind as I fell into a deep sleep. _"I swear if you finish that sentence, I will skin you and have your fur made into a new rug for my bedroom."_

* * *

The second time I woke up, I could have sworn I was dead. Whatever I was laying on bordered on being so unbelievably soft that it was almost uncomfortable. Not physically, more an emotional discomfort. If I wasn't dead, then I wanted to live right here and never move again. If that wasn't enough, I was surrounded in warmth and, remembering how cold I had been the first time I woke - this was Heaven in comparison.

"I think she's waking up." The deep voice was unfamiliar, definitely not belonging to either of the women from last time.

After a minute or two of silence, in which I assumed they were waiting - I opened my eyes - and almost immediately I was overcome with the sudden urge to laugh. Before me was a man, decked out in a full suit of plate armour - minus the helmet cradled in his arm - and with an honest to God sword strapped to his waist. "Nice outfit, Bedivere."

The man frowned down at me before he stepped to the side to reveal a rather attractive woman, who introduced herself with a smile. "I'm Red and this is Graham."

My first thought was, who named their child after a colour - but that seemed slightly insulting. While confused and somewhat skeptical of my current safety, I didn't think it would be wise to offend anyone and as I had recognised Red's voice the second she spoke, I knew she had been one of the woman responsible for saving me from freezing to death. "Am I dreaming, or is he really dressed as a Knight?"

"I am a Knight." He smiled.

Grimacing, I managed to push myself up so that I sat with my back against the headboard. "So I'm dreaming, got it."

Red frowned before she shook her head at me. "No, you're awake and about time too. You've been out for three days."

I sighed and closed my eyes, thinking that maybe if I went back to sleep, I would wake up somewhere normal as I muttered a response. "Must have been some really good drugs."

"Drugs?"

My eyes snapped back open and I stared at her, trying to figure out if she were being serious but she was hard to read, which was strange because I was generally pretty good at it. Eventually I just shrugged and dismissed the question with one of my own. "Where am I?"

"You're at the tavern."

I blinked and waited to see if there was more, but nothing was forthcoming. "Um.. could you be a little more specific?"

Red tilted her head curiously. "the Enchanted Forest? You're currently within the Lands of Queen Regina."

"Known more infamously as the Evil Queen." Graham added.

"Enchanted Forest and... the Evil Queen." I glanced between them both and I knew they found my disbelief strange, which was funny considering I found their story complete and utter batshit crazy.

"Yes."

"Right, are you about to tell me I'm a Princess? Because if so, I gotta tell ya I'm not all that fond of dresses." I laughed, but it cut short at the sight of the look they both directed my way.

Red shrugged a moment later and smiled once more. "I suppose you could be a Princess, though we were kind of hoping you could tell us who you are."

For the first time, I took in my surroundings. The weathered wood of the walls, the bare floors and the furniture that looked as though it belonged in Medieval times. By the time my eyes returned to them, questions continued to form in my mind and the last identity I had chosen slipped from my lips. "I'm Emma.. Emma Swan."

The second the name left my mouth, Graham bowed before he turned on his heel and left the room. When I looked to Red for an explanation, she merely shrugged and continued to smile at me as we sat there in silence.


	9. Earning Her Trust

**Author Note: **Incase it isn't obvious, we're back in the present for this one.

* * *

A week after our conversation, Regina had come into my room and informed me that I was officially off bed rest. However, since I was still in the process of healing, I had been relegated to the position of babysitter. That wasn't how she saw it, not that it mattered. Regardless of what one called it, the job itself was a huge show of her trust in me. It was a job that generally required a whole contingent of soldiers due to the Queen being insanely paranoid but as he was as bound to the Castle as I was, she was content to trust his safety to me.

My charge, Prince Henry was sat within the library, studiously bent over his books while his tutor droned on in the background - a tutor who I'm fairly certain is related to Bertha on account of the fact their mannerisms and ages were so strangely similar. The striking difference between them - besides the gender thing - was that he had to be at least twice her age. I was starting to wonder if Regina's entire household staff were reincarnated fossils.

For the next few weeks, in between strengthening myself for my return to duty and the late night visits from the Queen, I was responsible for the safety of the beloved son. I was stationed at the only entrance to the library during his studies, I accompanied him on his riding lessons - where I had been ordered to practice on improving my own. I was expected to aid in Henry's training, focusing mainly on stances and technique while Graham tested his attention to my lessons through sparring. The improvement Henry showed once placed under our tutelage, was remarked upon by Regina the last time she spectated one of his sessions.

As far as duties go, it could have been worse. The Prince was intelligent, entertaining and rather mature for his age. He was a lot more pleasant to be around than most adults, he enjoyed talking about his mother and he especially delighted in calling me his White Knight.

When I asked him why he felt the need to introduce me as such, he reminded me of the time I saved him and surprised me with a detail I had been unaware of. He said I had glowed - that an aura of golden light had surrounded us while we ran. I had been so caught up in outrunning the bandits that chased us with their bows and arrows, that I hadn't noticed. Intent on keeping him safe and getting as far away from them as I could, I had no idea my magic was responsible for the ease with which we escaped.

I panicked. He was just a child, you couldn't trust them with secrets. How was I supposed to tell him he needed to keep that to himself? I couldn't. So I did the next best thing - I went to Regina that night and yelled at her. I admit now, that wasn't the best thing in the least, but she surprisingly let me do so and reassured me that she would speak to him. That was three days ago and he had yet to bring it up again - perhaps I had been wrong about children after all.

"That is all for today, Master Henry. I believe the Queen is expecting you for your riding lesson."

Just as his tutor dismissed him, the doors to the library were flung open and in walked the Queen herself. There was a glint of amusement in her eyes as she looked from myself to the Prince, her voice teasing as she spoke to her son. "I do hope you're not planning to sneak away to read some more."

Henry grinned as he stacked his books neatly before he moved to his mother, grabbing my hand along the way and dragging me behind him - which seemed to add to her amusement. "I didn't know you would be joining us today, mother."

Regina smiled down at him. "I thought I would surprise you, besides someone has to make sure the Captain has been doing as she's told."

"My Queen, I am appalled that you would doubt my willingness to obey your _every_ command." Her smile turned mischievous and the glint had become somewhat lustful as she set it upon me, but she continued on to the stable without a word - while her Prince and Captain trailed behind, like two loyal puppies.

* * *

Henry rode ahead as Regina and I followed at a trot, keeping him in our sights while allowing him the freedom to ride as he pleased. Our horses kept pace with one another, and our knees occasionally brushed together. Neither of us had seen fit to begin conversation as we both seemed content with the silence. I had plenty of questions I wanted to ask, thoughts I easily became lost in. But while I knew she now preferred me to be myself, I sensed she had been building up to broaching something as we rode. So I waited and wondered, until she spoke.

"We found the children."

Feeling her eyes on me, I glanced sideways and kept my expression blank as I asked. "Oh? We're talking about this now, are we?"

She nodded as her gaze returned to the front. "I think I've made you wait long enough."

Well at the very least, one of the questions I had would be answered. "Right, so what happened?"

"It appears Snow White is searching for her daughter."

It took a moment for the information to sink in. Snow White, as in the Seven Dwarves, pure as the driven snow, supposed good guy and arch-nemesis of the Evil Queen - was abducting children. "And.. she decided kidnapping was the way to go about that?"

She chuckled. "Due to a truce we have had for the last five years, she couldn't very well attack me openly."

I didn't understand. People broke truces all the time, right? When I didn't respond, she turned to me once more and the confusion must have shown on my face because before I could ask, she elaborated. "The truce is a magically bound contract, which means it is unbreakable unless you're prepared to pay the rather severe consequences."

Without knowing more than I currently did about magic, I figured the specifics of that conversation could wait until later and focused on the more immediate topic. "Okay, did she manage to find her daughter?"

"No and she won't."

I already had so many questions. How she managed to go missing in the first place, how she ended up so far from home and what the hell all of this had to do with me. Ultimately though, I was more interested in what the Queen planned to do with her. "Why not?"

She seemed to study me briefly and I had no idea what she expected to find, but she shook her head a moment later and replied. "She's missing a very crucial piece of information, one which I am in possession of and have no immediate plans to share."

"I'm assuming that includes with me." I wasn't sulking - rather the opposite. She had shared more with me than I thought she would and while I knew there was information being left out, I was grateful to her because now I had one less thing to worry about.

My eyes dropped as she reached over and placed her hand on my thigh, and the light squeeze forced me to lift my gaze once more - the warmth of the eyes and smile I found looking back at me made my heart flutter against my chest. "There are certain things I will tell you in due time. For now, I wanted you to know they had been found, you may notice a few of the older villagers missing in the days to come as I had them sent to the White Kingdom to be with their children."

At that last bit, my brow furrowed and my confusion was even more obvious with my next question. "Why didn't you just get them back?"

She sighed. "Because the only way she would agree was if I returned the Princess to her."

Right, that made sense. "Which you don't want to do."

"I made a deal, one I have no intention of breaking and it involves her. So while I may not want to, I also have no choice." Typical that she would sate my curiosity with one statement, only to bring it back in full force with another. Unfortunately, when she took back her hand and urged her horse forward, it was clear she was done with the conversation.


	10. Into the Night

Regina came to my room that night and sat at the end of the bed with her back to me. I had no idea what I was supposed to do, if I was meant to say something or.. I don't know. Ever since I had revealed to her that I knew she had saved me the day that I arrived here, we had spent every night together - talking, getting to know each other. She seemed just as interested in the person I was, the person behind her Captain as I was in the one behind the Queen; but each of those nights had been spent in her garden.

The first few times had been difficult, uncomfortable more than anything else. Eventually my nervousness, her hesitance, the spurts of anger that overcame one of us when the other overstepped a boundary - they faded, slowly peeled away under our shared resolve to remain the stubborn people that we are. It never mattered how the night before ended because we knew that we would both return the next.

For some reason, tonight was different and I didn't know why. Once again I felt nervous, confused and a little bit suspicious. I trusted her of course, but this was a woman who despised sudden alterations in routine and- well, what the hell did she call this? But just as I was about to question her, she spoke. "I asked Graham if you were done with your training and he said you'd gone to bed."

Obviously she wouldn't have needed to come all this way to the opposite side of the castle to confirm Graham's claim, so there had to be more to it than that and I found myself feeling somewhat giddy at the prospect of her being incapable of merely waiting another hour. "If that were your only reason for being here, I imagine you could have used your mirror to see that wasn't true."

"Yes and I did."

There was humour in her voice, as if she already knew where my line of thought was headed which seemed reason enough to finish it. "Yet still, you are here. Either something bad has happened or -"

She stood from the bed and turned to stare down at me with a small smile playing across her lips. "Or.. I got impatient."

With an incline of my head, I returned her smile and patted the spot beside me. "At least that means we can avoid the trek to the garden."

My smile remained as she came around to the other side of the bed, her habit of always seeming regal continued to amuse me as I watched her mimic my position. It all looked so proper, the care she took with her dress as she sat down, the way her back rested perfectly against the headboard and the grace in which she crossed her legs at the ankles - It was unusual how she could look both comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time.

"So.." I began.

When I said nothing further and it was obvious I had nothing more to contribute, she chuckled. "Problem?"

My mouth opened and closed a few times as I considered a way to word my thoughts without sounding like a nervous teenager. When I came up with no alternative, I rolled my eyes and just said what I was thinking. "We're in my bedroom."

She hummed. "It's hardly the first time."

I nodded. "On my bed."

The humour in her tone returned, accompanied by the upturned quirk of her lips. "As I said, hardly the first time."

"But I'm not injured anymore." Obviously dumb observations were my forte for the night.

Her head lolled to the side as she faced me, her grin perfectly visible now as she raised her eyebrow. "I could be persuaded to alter that, if you're so inclined."

I laughed - because of course she could be considerate and threatening in the same sentence. "How thoughtfully sadistic of you."

Her grin widened as her eyes flashed with mischief. "_Anything_ for your comfort, dear."

"Right, it has nothing to do with the fact you enjoy causing pain." I teased.

She waved her hand dismissively and the small, barely noticeable wrinkle of her nose had me melting - Gods she could be adorable. "I'm the Evil Queen, that goes without saying."

I frowned at that, it still annoyed me that people had the gall to label someone as evil. It belonged in story books where black and white were clear cut, not the real world where there existed an abundance of grey. "Seriously, what is up with that title?"

"Meaning?"

"I mean you're the only monarch with a nickname. Queen Snow, King James, King Midas. Why are you the Evil Queen and not simply Queen Regina? I get that you've killed people, but I doubt you're any worse than the rest."

She looked at me - I mean really looked at me then, a bemused expression on her face. I had the distinct feeling she sort of began to pity me the longer she stared. "That.." she paused and shook her head. ".. is debatable. However, it was Snow White that labelled me as such. You know the story, do you not?"

No, that definitely was not what she had wanted to say and it was clear to a degree that this was as close to a change of subject as one could get while still somehow managing to stay on topic. "I know a story, yes. Two of them, actually. I question the accuracy of the one from my world and I only have half of the other."

She blinked, then frowned and shifted until her entire body faced me. "Your world knows of this one?"

"Not exactly, you're kind of a uh.. fairy tale there. Characters from our imagination used to teach children lessons."

"Delightful." Having grimaced beforehand, it was somewhat of a giveaway as to how she truly felt about the information.

Instead of calling pointless attention to an insignificant lie, I decided to go a more educational route. "Not really. You're depicted as an old, evil crone with vanity issues."

Her eyes widened innocently as she placed a hand over her chest. "Me? Vain?"

I laughed and shook my head. "Yes. Because being the evil, old crone that you are- obviously your lack of vanity is where my disagreement comes from."

"And what is it you disagree with, hmm?"

I thought about it and then realised I really didn't even need to. The tale of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves seemed wrong about practically everything so far. I mean sure, I had heard that the poisoned apple thing had happened, but aside from that? "Well, the old crone part is extremely unbelievable considering I've seen you with my own eyes but.. I'm also beginning to question the evil as well."

"Are you disappointed? I could start pushing the elderly over in the street."

I kept my face perfectly straight as I offered my own suggestion. "I was thinking more along the lines of rounding up a group of children, planting a cauldron in the square and holding a cooking competition each night."

She snorted. "The person who creates the most creative and tastiest dish of the children wins a week-long reprieve from the dungeons."

My stomach chose then to alert us both to the fact I hadn't yet had dinner and I glanced down at it, feigning horror as I mumbled. "I swear, I'm not a cannibal." Her responding laughter was infectious.

xxx

We made our way through the left-wing of the castle, down to the kitchens where Regina began pulling things from the stores. I half-expected a group of servants to appear and usher us out of the room while they prepared our meal, as though Regina would send for them and pull them from their beds. It wasn't much of a surprise that it didn't happen considering we had been together the entire time and unless she was telepathic - which I suppose is a possibility given who she is - she hadn't contacted anyone since coming to my room.

The more items she pulled out and placed on the counter, the harder my mind and stomach worked to convince me to risk my life and climb up there to stuff my face. Within seconds of the first cut of the knife through salted pork, I darted forward and snatched the slice, popping it into my mouth before she could stop me. "Making your own food? Shock and awe."

She rolled her eyes and swatted me belatedly. "I'm a Queen, not an invalid."

As I watched the knife glide smoothly through meats, cheeses and fruit, I ignored the sounds of my stomach as best I could and distracted myself with conversation. "I've been thinking.."

She interrupted me as she arranged the platters of food, feigning concern with a smirk. "Does your head hurt? Do you need me to soothe the pain?"

"You know, you're much nicer when you're being a flirtatious tease. Right now you're all sassy and mean."

Eyebrow raised, she handed me one of the platters before picking up her own and moving toward the dining hall, talking over her shoulder as she went. "I wouldn't want to bore you by becoming predictable."

I scoffed and picked at the food while I followed behind. "Bore me? Your outfits alone could keep me entertained for years."

"Why Captain, are you admitting your attraction to me?"

Trick question, I'd have to be brain-dead not to be attracted to this woman and she damn well knows it. "No, I'm saying I like to admire your cleavage, two totally different things."

She sighed as she placed her food down and pulled out her seat. "To think of all the effort I put into my appearance, it's always the breasts that get the attention."

I let my eyes roam purposely slow over each curve of her body, allowing her the time to catch me leering before I took a seat. "My Queen, every inch of you has my attention." I paused to wink at her before adding. "I just happen to worship the very best of you."

She chuckled as she flicked her wrist, conjuring the two, dangerously full goblets of wine that appeared beside our platters. "As much as I enjoy feeling like a piece of meat.. and I truly do. I can't help but wonder what it was you were thinking before this welcome appreciation of my assets."

"Oh right, that." Having enjoyed the distraction, I almost regretted bringing that up. Hesitating, I reached for the goblet and drained almost half of it before I admitted what had been on my mind then. "I was curious about the truce you mentioned, between yourself and Snow White."

I could plainly see the Queen returning, the masks and walls coming back in to place which caused me to now completely regret mentioning the truce at all. I tried to shrug off the feeling of dread, knowing it was too late to back out now. "I just.. wanted to know how it was possible for her to enter your Kingdom and take those kids without breaking the truce."

"Oh." I wasn't sure if the dread I felt was suppose to fade or intensify at the sound of relief, but I was certainly confused now. "It was to prevent acts of aggression, she brought physical harm to no one doing what she did."

That personal barrier where I breath and draw a line against the rest of the world – slowly building into a bubble of exasperation and annoyance. A truce against physical harm, I mean really has no one in this world heard of emotional or mental scarring. "Seriously? It protects you against war and assassinations, that's it?"

"She's Snow White, I didn't require protection from anything else." she shrugged.

"And what of your people?"

She studied me curiously, head tilted to the side, lips pursed. Minutes passed in what I can only assume was time she took to think, which just served to annoy me further and her words certainly didn't help. "What of them? She may consider me to be evil, but she would not hold the people I govern to blame, they're perfectly safe."

"She kidnapped their children!" I immediately blushed, embarrassed by the outburst and perhaps a little fearful of the repercussions.

I sighed my relief when all she did was shrug once more. "She was searching for her daughter and she knows me well enough to know I would not assist her, especially when I am the one she blames for having to send her away to begin with."

Recalling the brief conversation that day I had been found, I didn't need to ask. "Because you were going to curse them?"

My relief was short lived when she snapped. "How did you know about that?"

"I.. overheard Red mentioning it to you that day in the forest."

Whatever she was about to say was interrupted by the doors to the hall being thrown open, a member of her personal guard entering a moment later.

"What is it, Clive?" she growled.

"The Blue Fairy is here, your Majesty. She has requested your presence." I could pin-point the exact second the Queen returned in full force. Her expression now blank, posture rigid as she pushed back her chair to stand.

"Apologies, Captain- it seems I have a guest to greet." I moved to perform the courtesy farewell, only for her to halt the action by raising her hand, her gaze softening as she caught my eye. "Finish your meal, we can continue this tomorrow night."

I watched her leave with a frown and made note to find out more about that curse.

* * *

**Author Note: **Dun dun dun. No, but seriously** - **I wanted to ask if there would be any objections to a rating change in the somewhat near future? You all love FTB moments, right? You can be honest, I don't _have _to include smut in every story I write.. right? Come on, guys tell my muse we don't need that nonsense. She'll listen to you.


	11. Three Strikes

The first time it happened, I was in the training yard with Henry. It was the day after the Blue Fairy arrived and I was helping the Prince with his defence, he was getting pretty good at it too. When the messenger came, he conveyed the Queen's sincerest apologies that she wouldn't be able to make our evening rendezvous in the garden. While I looked forward to the evenings, I knew that being the Queen meant Regina would have to postpone them at least some of the time and with that in mind, I thanked him for letting me know and sent him on his way.

The second time, I was on my way back from escorting the Prince to his room. I was tired and hungry, neither of which inspired me to be in a good mood, so I was perhaps a little more temperamental than I would have otherwise been had someone not watched where they were going. After a dose of self-inflicted guilt as a result of almost making the messenger cry, it didn't really hit me that the Queen had cancelled once again until I reached my room. By then I just wanted to go to bed, not caring that I hadn't eaten and hoping I would feel less down-trodden in the morning.

Now, it was about to happen again and I was fed up. When the messenger approached, I raised my hand to him before he even opened his mouth. I didn't need to hear it, I hadn't even caught a glimpse of her since that night, so obviously she was avoiding me. Whatever reason she had, she hadn't shared it with me and if this was going to continue, then I wasn't going to let it bother me.

"You'll return to her to confirm you've delivered your message, yes?"

The boy nodded.

"This the same message as last time?"

Another nod.

"Then when you return, please tell the Queen that she needn't bother any more. These constant interruptions to my day serve no one and I will no longer be expecting her company on any future night."

The utter look of terror on the boys features served as a reminder that while I may receive special treatment from time to time, she was still the same woman who instilled fear in her subjects and I shook my head, dismissing the idea of upsetting the Queen via small children. "Okay, I don't want to get you killed."

When he sighed his relief, I decided a message as Captain would be better received rather than the one I would have preferred but ultimately would have had to deliver myself if I didn't want anyone executed. "Just tell her I appreciate her consideration, but these messages are unnecessary and I will no longer be expecting her presence during the evening. If she wishes to resume, then she knows where to find me."

After he left, the day continued without incident and having heard no whispers of a sudden death in someone's family, I was confident that the messenger would reappear in time - delivering disappointment and threats to all the other unfortunate souls who had pledged their loyalty to the Queen.

I threw myself into the daily routine that I had adapted and would continue with in the weeks to come – taking the Prince to his lessons in the library, horse riding and then training with Graham before returning him to the castle. I knew my mood was deteriorating throughout the day and my melancholy began to draw attention from every direction. At first I tried to ignore the not so subtle looks that people started to give me because no matter how his mother had been acting, I didn't want to ruin the day for Henry.

When it came time to retire for the night and he was safely behind closed doors, I made my way to the tavern where I hoped to drown my misery. Red and Graham were both inside already, waiting for me to join them and after signalling for my usual, I walked over to them and sat down.

"How is my second-in-command faring on this most wonderful of days?" I grimaced at his disgustingly cheerful mood and swatted his arm away as he went to slap me on the back.

"Commander, you're supposed to shy _away _from the Captain today unless you want to be zapped by the giant thunderous cloud above her head." I rolled my eyes as she laughed and resigned myself to putting up with them while I drank.

As the night progressed and the conversation became even more asinine than normal, I started noticing that the looks I had been receiving throughout the day had progressed from furtive glances to outright staring.

The indifference that had been slowly weaving itself around me faded, and the sound of my half-finished mug slamming down to the table was easily heard over the laughter and nauseating jubilation of the patrons. I came to my feet and started for the door, ignoring the faintly drunken calls of both Red and Graham as they tried to convince me to return.

* * *

While the walk back to the palace did wonders for my sobriety, it did nothing to dampen the frustration I felt at having been discarded so easily and without explanation by the Queen. I guess it ended up bothering me after all but honestly, what type of person would take that kind of thing lying down? One who let fear dictate their actions and if my not fitting that description hadn't been established already, it was about to be.

As I marched through the corridors, the scowl I wore effectively redirected the curious stares from the servants. The guards were somewhat less cooperative and their attempts to engage me in conversation only added to my annoyance. Fortunately the closer I was to the Royal Quarters, the Queen's preference for her own magic protection meant they were more spread out and I wasn't forced to tolerate a passing patrol every half a minute.

Coming to the door I suspected to be the room I would find her in, I paused in my move to fling it open when I heard a voice I didn't recognise coming from within. "Do you truly believe her loyalty to you will be enough to stop her from running right into his hands?"

"What are you talking about? She doesn't even know who he is."

Frowning, I leaned against the wall and continued to listen as I wondered who it was they were talking about. "No, but they do and when she tells them she's been with you for the last three years, what do you think they will do?"

"Emma wouldn't allow that." My eyes widened at the use of my name.

"You're assuming they would give her a choice."

Growling, I pushed off of the wall and shoved the doors open, completely ignoring their shocked expression as I entered the room and slammed them shut again. "Sorry to interrupt, your Majesty."

"Excuse me a moment, Blue - it seems my Captain has lost her damn mind." Before I knew it, Regina grabbed hold of my arm and dragged me into an adjoining room.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Despite sensing that she sounded far more tired than she did angry, the combination of emotions I had repressed the last three days had already surfaced. Even if I had wanted to, I couldn't fake the civility and submission that her mere presence demanded. "You two are in there, talking about me and you want to know what I'm doing? Oh you have no right to be pissed at me."

Seemingly intrigued by the insubordination, she arched an eyebrow and took a step closer. "I talk about a lot of people, do you think that gives them the right to barge in on my private conversations?"

"That depends, have you been keeping secrets from them and avoided them for the last three fucking days?"

"She hasn't been avoiding you." A voice that belonged to neither of us silenced whatever her response would have been and she closed her mouth without having uttered a single word.

Glancing to the now open doorway, the sight of the fairy fuelled the anger and brought a sneer to my lips. "Who the fuck asked you?"

She moved into the room and waved the door closed, resting a hand upon the Queen's shoulder as she came to stand beside her. "Calm yourself, Captain and take a seat... unless you would rather be executed in the morning, then by all means, continue cursing the one you claim fealty to."

I tore my eyes from her, returning my attention to Regina and with one simple look, I could tell that if my life _was _in danger, it wasn't the Queen I needed to worry about. Resisting the urge to continue yelling, I brushed past them and dropped down into one of the chairs.

Once they were both seated, Blue began speaking. "As I said when I walked in, she hasn't been avoiding you. In fact, she's spent this whole visit trying to convince me to bend the rules of our deal so that she may share some things with you."

Alarmed with the recollection of Regina's comment that night about magical contracts, the hair on the back of my neck rose. "What deal?"

"That will become clear in time."

Damned fairies and their secretive bullshit, it was like pulling teeth with these people. "You mean I'll know eventually, but you're just going to piss about and refuse to tell me now."

Her smile did little to dissuade my sudden suspicion of her. "When I feel you are trustworthy, you will know. Until then..."

"Whatever. If you're not going to tell me anything then why did I need to sit down?"

"Not one to beat about the bush, is she?"

"It's one of her charms." Regina smirked.

"Hey love-birds, still wondering why I haven't been kicked out yet." With a roll of her eyes, Regina stood and crossed to the fireplace where - within seconds - the sound of liquid being poured filled the room.

Blue fixed me with a glare that could rival the Queen's – meaning it was completely wasted on me and as soon as she realised that, she seemed to dismiss the notion of trying to intimidate me. "The conversation you so rudely interrupted was only one of many. While I will not concede to the latest request, I have agreed to others."

"I'm listening."

"Your arrival to our land was foreseen long before you appeared that day in the forest, which is why you were found and didn't simply freeze to death. I am what is known as a seer, one who-"

Cutting her off mid-sentence, I chose to simplify what was likely to be a confusing explanation and averted a potential headache. "Sees visions of the future, yeah I know what a seer is. Why is this relevant?"

Regina sighed as a goblet came into my line of sight and spoke while I accepted the offered drink. "Either you want to know, or you don't – stop interrupting her."

Having had the privilege of sampling the cider on multiple occasions, I knew how potent it tended to be and decided to make it last. If I were to have any hope of remembering this conversation, the last thing I needed was to end up getting drunk - regardless of the fact my body was in the process of a rather passionate disagreement with my mind about that thought. After taking a sip, I nodded for the fairy to continue and slumped further into the chair.

"The reason I informed the Queen of your appearance here is because I believe you would otherwise be in danger and she is the only one capable of providing you with the protection you need to keep you safe from those who wish you harm."

I don't know if she was referring to the people from my world or if she meant someone else entirely, but the concept of being in danger was such a familiar state of being for me that it seemed irrelevant in comparison to other things I wanted to ask. "And what do you get out of this?"

Regina barely hesitated but her voice was soft, surprisingly verging on the edge of shy as she answered. "When I agreed, it was for selfish reasons. What I had hoped to gain from having you in my kingdom doesn't compare to what I ended up getting. I know that doesn't answer your question, but know that having you here means far more than I ever thought it would."

Her confession in combination with the cider warming me from the inside out sapped what little remained of my anger and for the first time today, I smiled. Leaning forward, I placed my goblet on the table and looked to Blue. "You said there were a few concessions?"

Before she could respond, Regina was beside my chair once more and her hand gently gripped my shoulder as she addressed the fairy. "I believe I can handle the rest."

Blue stood and offered us both another smile that conveyed precisely how full of shit her following words were. "A pleasure meeting you, Captain." And with a nod toward the Queen, she made her exit.

* * *

**Author Note: **Rating change will take place next chapter, thank you to all who did an utterly crap job at dissuading my muse - You're all going to Hell.


	12. Deviating from Discoveries

When Blue was out of sight, Regina's hand remained on my shoulder as she stayed put and I tilted my head back to look up at her. Trying not to focus on the way she seemed to subconsciously knead me, I asked. "So, what's this other secret?"

Fingers paused their ministrations as she glanced down to me, resuming their movement a moment later as they traced a path up my throat, over my chin and along my jaw. "It's not much of a secret since you're already aware of the curse I didn't cast."

Holding back the disappointed sigh that came with the loss of contact when her hand fell to her side and she stepped around my chair, I distracted myself by admiring the subtle sway of hips as she crossed to her seat. "The one you were surprised I knew about?"

"Had I known you'd been eavesdropping that night..." she trailed off as she sat down. "Well, things could have been different but it's too late to dwell on that now."

After spending a significant amount of time together, I knew not to push for an explanation and filed away my curiosity on that for another time. "Okay.. so what don't I know?"

"It was given to me by a man who goes by the name of Rumpelstiltskin, he was also the one who taught me how to harness my magic. He made me believe that he wanted to help me, that by casting the curse I would have all that I desired. Only before his plan came to fruition, I learned that Snow White was pregnant."

As she talked, she appeared to be studying me for a reaction and by the crease of her forehead, I would chance a guess that my indifference to the tale confused her. All I learned from it was that Rumpelstiltskin was real and that he was no different from the other fairytale characters I grew up hearing stories about; wrong. The fact he sounded more villainous than a gold spinning, deal-for-your-baby making weirdo came as no surprise. "And this stopped you from casting it? Why?"

"Not stop, it delayed me. He told me that when I cast the curse, it would send us to another land where time would be frozen. Due to my thirst for vengeance, I decided that I would allow Snow to have her child and upon her birth, I would cast the curse and take her to raise as my own."

"I uh.. don't know what to say to that."

Clearly not expecting the admission, she sounded unsure in her belief of my response. "No?"

"Well, I've seen the kinds of things women go through during a 9 month pregnancy. Having to go through that for the rest of your life? I couldn't even imagine how much that would suck, so your whole revenge thing actually seems more like a mercy."

Running a hand through my hair, I chuckled sheepishly at how insane that sounded. "I don't approve of what you did, but I don't think it's my approval that you want and it's not like you can undo the past. Even if you could, I don't expect you would so.. really what can I say to that?"

"You're not going to accuse me of being evil and leave?"

I smirked. "It's a bit late for that, don't you think?"

The rise of her eyebrow made it clear she was going to need more of an explanation, so I did my best to provide one. "I've known who you were since I woke up in that tavern. I've heard the stories of your reign, the misery and death you've inflicted over the years and all this was before I swore my life to you. Judging and turning my back on you now, doesn't really serve a purpose or make any kind of sense."

I've known from the beginning that she wasn't someone who shared things about herself, let alone her motivations behind said things, so the silence that followed wasn't unexpected. What she was doing, here with me – it was new, something she had very little experience with. Having someone who understood but chose not to judge when they very well could, I suppose sometimes it could be just as difficult to accept as negativity, especially when _that _is what you've come to accept from others.

When I thought enough time had passed, I prompted her to continue with another question. "So, the kid – what happened?"

She sighed in a way that made it clear she was resigned to finishing her story, even if she wasn't entirely comfortable with it. "Someone shared my plan with Snow and as soon as she gave birth, she sent the child away - I was too late."

"But you still didn't cast the curse?"

With a shake of her head, she began to explain. "I discovered a few days later that Rumpelstiltskin was the one who warned her, that the child was somehow important to him and as Snow was already suffering with the loss.."

Connecting the dots, I came to the conclusion out loud. "You made it even worse by hitting her with the fact she gave up her child for nothing, which also happened to mess with whatever Rumpelstiltskin had planned – it was payback."

"Yes."

One day, I was going to make it my mission to find out the story behind this feud - as well as I could understand exactly how fulfilling revenge was, the lengths she had gone to for hers seemed a little extreme. "Do you regret any of it?"

"I'm beginning to learn that while life comes with its fair share of hardships, the paths we travel mean nothing in the overall scheme of things. Regret is ultimately pointless, Fate will occur regardless of how one feels. The past is what made me the person I am, without it I might not have my son or even my life and I probably wouldn't have met you. Do you think I should regret the things I cannot change, when they are responsible for what little happiness I have in my life?"

As important as everything she had just said was - no matter how many times I tried to dislodge the thought, my mind refused to focus on anything other than that one, specific sentence. "I'm sorry, did you just admit that I make you happy?"

Any other time, I might have been embarrassed by the blank stare my words received and would have attempted to stumble my way through a change in subject before she laughed in my face. As it were, speech eluded me and after a minute or two of silence - rather than a laugh – she gave an exasperated sigh. "Had anyone else barged into my chambers, unannounced and without a modicum of respect, I would have set them on fire."

Ignoring the note of irritation in her voice, I stood from my chair and slowly walked over to her. "So, that's a yes then?"

She rolled her eyes. "Are you on fire?"

I pursed my lips to prevent the grin that wanted to spread across my face. "I have a feeling if I don't stop teasing you, I will be."

The corner of her mouth twitched. "That's a fair assumption."

"Well then.."

I positioned my hands on the arms of the chair where she sat, I bent down and brushed my lips against hers. While she didn't lean away, I was disappointed that she didn't immediately accept the invitation. "What are you doing?"

My stomach fluttered at the feel of the soft lips, lightly caressing mine as she spoke. A sigh of contentment escaped me, followed by my murmured question. "Aren't you tired of talking?"

When she didn't respond, I retreated a little to give her some space and smiled at the sight of her biting her lip. Coaxing it from between her teeth with a stroke of my thumb, I gave her the one chance to back out before it was too late. "Do you want me to leave?"

Shaking her head, she nipped the tip of my thumb and purred. "I very much do not want you to do that."

"Good." I ran my fingers along her jaw, curling them around the back of her neck as our lips connected. Urging her to stand with a gentle tug against her neck, I pulled her against me and slipped an arm around her waist.

What began as something tender, soon deepened and evolved into so much more. Hands threaded themselves within my hair while her tongue demanded an entrance, one that was quickly granted as I eagerly parted my lips. The instant our tongues met, my body heated with arousal and all the thoughts, the fantasies, the lust-filled glances and years worth of longing - for the woman who now had her tongue down my throat – merged and filled me with the desire to simply take her then and there.

When our mouths parted, I reached for the laces along her spine that held the sinfully tight corset in place, loosening each one before pulling it apart and tearing it from her body. With the piece gone, there was nothing in the way to prevent me from fully appreciating breasts that were shamelessly displayed day in and day out.

The second I lowered my eyes to take in the sight, she chuckled and took three steps back, providing a view that had my mouth drying instantly. The way she looked now – free from the confines of those ridiculous corsets, her lower half encased in tight, black leather as it hugged each curve – would have me on my knees, were my life not already hers.

"See something you like, dear?"

Sucking my bottom lip between my teeth, I soaked in every minute detail and burned the perfect vision into my brain. When our gazes finally met, I confessed my thought of just how much of an understatement that question was. "Like - doesn't even begin to describe what I'm feeling right now."

Brown eyes flashed with an unmistakable hunger and she beckoned me forward, her hand knotting in the fabric of my shirt as soon as I was close enough. With the sensation across the back of my neck as my only warning, I grasped her hips just in time as we were transported to her bedchamber in a billow of purple smoke.

* * *

When the smoke cleared, I was surprised to find myself on my back with her straddling my waist. Grinning down at me as her fingers trailed the buttons along my shirt, she expertly popped each of them open and seemed to read my mind, answering a thought I had yet to ask. "I assumed this was where you planned for us to end up."

"Well sure, I just thought it might involve a little more.. walking." My hands took on a mind of their own as they began to play along her sides, fingers lightly stroking across her ribs which elicited a shiver that pimpled her skin with goosebumps.

"Up." She tugged my shirt even as I complied with the command, whether it was because of her impatience or that she had dim-witted lovers in the past who needed emphasis to understand the obvious - I wasn't sure. And really, this was hardly the time to ask. Once she had flung the shirt to the floor, she brought her arms up around my neck and pulled me into another kiss. There was no tenderness involved in this one, the feel of our breasts pressed together had moans erupting from both of us that fuelled an already heated kiss as our tongues explored and devoured each other.

It was the hand on my chest, pushing me back that broke us apart and even before I had fully laid back down, her lips found my pulse point and latched on. As she began to suck, I arched into hands that caressed the sensitive flesh of my breasts and my own hands wandered the naked expanse of her back, nails softly scraping each time I felt the light pain of teeth as they sank into my neck.

On a path littered with lips, tongue and teeth - she made her way from collarbone to chest. The feel of her breath had my nipples harden in the second or two it took before one was engulfed in the wet warmth of her mouth. As I clung to her back with one hand, I raised the other to free her hair from its bonds and tangled my fingers through the silken strands.

Her hand travelled the length of my stomach before it came to rest above the waist of my trousers and I could feel the quirk of her lips against my breast as I squirmed beneath her, my hips bucking in an attempt to find a friction that wasn't there.

When she switched her attention to my neglected nipple, I groaned aloud as my impatience got the better of me and she chuckled - which only served to add to my frustration as it sent vibrations through me. With a murmured, "Patience." she kissed a path between my breasts and slowly descended my torso, nipping and licking every inch of skin as she went.

If I had to wait much longer, I had a feeling something was going to spontaneously combust and I couldn't guarantee that it wouldn't start with my own body. "Says the woman who magicked us on to the bed." I mumbled.

"Hush." Her tongue swirled my bellybutton before teeth bit into flesh and her fingers slipped beneath the waistband of my trousers. She scooted back until she rested between my legs and the slight pull was all the encouragement I needed as I raised my hips from the bed, eager for her to ease the throb that had built-up and bordered the edge of pain. Sliding from the bed, she removed my boots with a yank and tossed them to the floor before she peeled the form-fitting leather from my legs.

She stroked from ankle to thigh as she resumed her place between my legs, her eyes firmly fixed to my wet, aching core as she purred. "Excited, dear?"

Patience long since gone, I huffed. "I swear to God."

"That's rather inappropriate when you're already sworn to me, Captain." She smirked as she leaned in to brush her lips against mine and I gasped as her fingers suddenly and easily penetrated me, giving her the opening she needed to slip her tongue passed my lips. Pelvis firmly pressed against the back of her hand, she gave me no time to adjust to the intrusion as she began to thrust into me with her hips.

The second she was inside of me, my mind went blank and every single sense became amplified. The sound of my heart pounded in my ears, mingling with her moans as she seemed to relish fucking me – relentlessly and with unbelievable precision as she never once failed to hit the spot that would inevitably lead to my being thrown over the figurative edge.

I could feel the familiar pressure that promised a sweet release into oblivion and I did everything in my power to resist giving in so soon. I tried to focus on the kiss and the feel of soft lips, losing myself in the delectable flavour of her tongue as she consumed me but then her mouth was gone, returned to my pulse where teeth grazed and a tongue soothed. I tried to slow her down by wrapping my legs around her body but even with the decreased pace, her fingers delved just as deep, just as hard and I was quickly losing the battle to make it last.

Walls clenched around fingers as she tore her mouth away and started to whisper words in my ear, demanding that I reward her for all that she was doing to me. When her fingers curled to repeatedly stroke the rough patch of skin, I cried out her name and my body shook as it surrendered to its Queen.

* * *

**Author Note: **I swear I thought writing this would never bloody end, do you people realise how insanely difficult it is to write smut in first person? It's ridiculous!


	13. Say My Name

**Author Note:** _**FairyTaleArchtypes** - _among others (mostly her) thought I should write a reciprocation scene, so here ya go. There's some insignificant plot at the bottom that I'm sure none of you will be interested in because you're all perverts intent on going to Hell, enjoy.

* * *

It had been hours since we first came to bed, hours in which our bodies sweated and writhed with one another in endless pleasure. Soon, dawn would approach and we were both expected to rise with the sun for another day of routine and duty. This is what should have gone through my mind but as I ran my hand over the taut flesh of her stomach, nothing beyond how much I still wanted her seemed important.

When exhaustion had taken its toll and pulled her into the depths of unconsciousness, sleep eluded me and I found myself captivated by the sounds of her shallow breaths and the content expression she wore as she slept. As time wore on, my body began to recover and my arousal for the woman reawakened as it became more aware of its surroundings. The way her breasts rose in the dim light of the room, the heat that radiated from her flesh and the hand that clasped my inner thigh. It was a gesture that showed she had laid claim to me even in sleep and one that – while unnecessarily possessive – made me smile all the same.

I pressed a kiss to her shoulder and felt her body stir beneath my touch, her fingers lazily brushing my thigh as her hand shifted in her slow return to consciousness. As I brought my lips across her collarbone and pressed kisses along my way to her jaw, the sleep-filled husk of her voice caressed my ears and had my legs clenching together. "Emma?"

"Yes, my Queen?" I murmured as I peppered her skin with kisses.

She breathed a sigh and seemed to take notice of where her hand resided and – much to my chagrin – she removed it. My displeasure was short-lived however, when barely a second later she had me moaning into her throat as she cupped me between the legs. "I see I need to work a little harder to tire you out."

I chuckled softly at the inaccuracy of the comment. In the other world, a night of uninterrupted sex generally ended when I was the one that passed out but with her it felt different – she was different. This wasn't a simple one-night stand - at least I hoped it wasn't - and I didn't do it to sate my body's natural desire for it. No, this time it was because I wanted her. I yearned to spend every available second together, bringing her pleasure and now that the opportunity had presented itself, sleeping seemed wasteful. The exhaustion I felt was significant and I would definitely pay for it later in the day while training but I didn't care.

With a sly grin, I lifted the fur that hid the rest of her body and gave her a once-over before speaking. "Believe me, I need sleep after everything you did to me but closing my eyes seemed like such a waste of a good view."

Amusement danced in her eyes as she rolled on top of me, pinning me to the bed and putting a welcome pressure on my core as she rose to her hands and smirked down at me. "The rule of: Look, don't touch - doesn't apply in my bedchamber, Captain."

Sliding an arm around her, I raised an eyebrow and asked, "Is that so?"

"Very much so." She lowered her head and captured my mouth with her own, her tongue flitting across my lip as she began to grind against me.

Not wanting a repeat of our first time, I tightened my arm around her waist and flipped our positions, ignoring the growl the action received and the mild sting of nails as they dug into the skin of my back when I parted my lips for her.

In true Queenly fashion, she made it quite clear that; top or bottom, she was the one in control and while that unwavering need to dominate of hers tended to bother me under normal circumstances, this was a situation in which I could tolerate and even appreciate it. She didn't need my fealty or my heart, all she need do was kiss me the way she was now and she would forever own me. Lost within the intoxicating taste and feel of her mouth on mine, she had managed to slip her hand back between my legs and I knew that if I wanted to have my way, I needed to put a stop to it sooner rather than later.

When I felt her fingers attempt to separate folds, I pushed our bodies together and trapped her hand between us. She growled in protest once more, her arm struggling beneath my weight and when she finally gave in to the fact she couldn't move, she settled for rubbing her middle finger along my slit. Leaving her mouth, I sat up to take hold of her wrist and pushed her hand away and while I had known she would protest, I hadn't expected the hurt reflected in her eyes as I met her gaze.

The desire to remove it was overwhelming and I raised my hand to stroke her cheek, with a soft smile I tried to reassure her. "I want to please you."

Her bottom lip extended in a pout and her voice oozed pure sex when she responded. "Then let me touch you."

Shaking my head; amused by her blatant attempt to manipulate me, I began to string kisses down her neck and across her chest. "It's.. my.. turn." Each word emphasised with teeth as I nipped the soft flesh of her breast and before she could argue, I wrapped my lips around an already hardened nipple, flicking the tip with my tongue as her body responded and she arched into my mouth.

When her dissent reduced to nothing more than whimpers and wanton moans, I shifted my weight and nestled comfortably between her legs, staring down at swollen lips soaked with her arousal. It wasn't the first time I had tasted her but the anticipation was just as sweet, just as strong and when her hips rose to urge me on, I gave in to the unspoken demand and draped her leg over my shoulder before I lowered my mouth to her core. She let forth a guttural growl as I pressed through her folds, gathering the warm, salty juices on my tongue as the sounds of our pleasure melded together and filled the otherwise silent room.

Her hand found its way to my head and held me down as I laved attention on her pussy – although she hadn't needed to as I was addicted to the taste of her and had no intention of moving from my position. I continued to moan as she filled my mouth, sending vibrations through her that had her squirming and thrusting herself against my tongue.

When the grip tightened in my hair and I felt her nails digging into my scalp, I pressed two of my fingers to her entrance and slowly slid them inside her. Sucking her clit into my mouth, I traced it with my tongue as I began to rhythmically pump in and out in time with her thrusts.

The gasped curses that I dragged from her were getting louder, more frequent until my name tore from her throat with a strangled cry and her body shook with her release. I eased up on my attention to her sensitive nub but didn't stop completely, bringing her down from her high while claiming my reward with the soft, cleansing licks of my tongue.

After what seemed like such a short time, she stirred beneath me and I slipped my fingers from inside her and rolled away, hating the loss of contact the second it was gone but - resigned to the inevitability of having to start the day - I pushed myself off of the bed and wandered around the room to gather my clothes.

Her eyes had fluttered open by the time I found everything and she watched me dress, only choosing to speak once my shirt was back on. "Come and find me around noon, I need to speak with Snow White and I'd rather not have anyone else accompany me. Red can handle Henry's riding lesson today and I'll deal with his assigned guards for afterwards."

Half my attention focused on fastening the buttons of my shirt, I nodded at her words and muttered, "Noted."

"Emma?"

Curious of the way she purred my name, I looked to her with my eyebrow raised. "Yes?"

She crooked her finger at me with a smirk and said, "Come here."

I moved to stand beside the bed where she gestured for me to come closer. Getting the hint, I bent down and captured her lips as she clasped the back of my neck. Still naked, I couldn't resist running my hands along her body before cupping her breasts and lightly kneading them as our tongues danced together.

Breaking the kiss, she smiled and ran her fingers through my hair before she released me. "Our talks resume tonight."

Not having expected that, I blinked stupidly before a dopey grin spread across my face and with another quick peck to her lips, I replied as I made my way to the door. "As you wish." And I carried the sudden rush of euphoria all the way back to my room.

* * *

The sounds of horrified gasps and a scream - that was entirely unnecessary in my opinion - pierced the room when we appeared. It wasn't a pleasant greeting to say the least and were it not for Regina's hand on my back, I would have been tempted to find the one that made the sound so I could stab them in the throat.

There was noticeable relief that spread throughout the room when the scream died and Snow White quickly drew everyone's attention, her voice silencing those that had begun murmuring. "Regina, to what do we owe the pleasure?"

Sniffing in what was so obviously disdain for the woman, Regina waved her hand dismissively as she glared around at the people gathered. "Leave us."

I suppose my surprise was unwarranted when they obeyed the command, not when her very presence practically forced a person into submission. It just seemed odd that none of them even tried to raise a protest when one considered the fact she wasn't even their Queen. When the throne room was clear, Snow stood and descended the three short steps to the floor. Coming to stand before us, she gestured toward me and asked, "You don't usually travel with guests, who is this?"

"This is Swan, my new Knight-Captain." At hearing my last name, I rolled my eyes beneath my hood and managed to resist a sigh but at the amused glance she threw me, I knew Regina had known the purpose of the barely audible cough I gave in its place.

"Really? What happened to.." Snow tapped her chin and frowned. "Hood, was it?"

"Tragic accident." Regina supplied.

"Oh?"

"Yes, the silly man slipped into a noose. I'm still not sure if it was the loss of air that killed him or if he died of embarrassment for being so very.. clumsy." There was an absurd amount of willpower needed on my part to resist laughing, mainly because even though she wasn't telling the whole truth - it wasn't a complete lie either. In reality, Robin had been responsible for the Prince's kidnapping and he had been sentenced to hang the moment the Queen heard of his involvement. The way Snow White blanched only added to my amusement, I nearly lost it completely when Regina winked at me.

Shaking her head, Snow exhaled loudly. "How is Henry?"

"You mean the boy you orphaned? He's doing wonderfully. Really Snow, your track record with children is just terrible. Why you came and stole a dozen of them from me is beyond comprehension."

At the pained look that overcame Snow's expression, the Queen's look was positively gleeful as she continued. "First you stuff your daughter into a wardrobe and send her to who knows where, then you kill the parents of a 5-year-old boy and I believe your last scheme involved the hiring of some bandits to steal the child you made an orphan – I don't know what I would have done without my Captain here."

Any semblance of civility vanished as Snow snarled and moved until only an inch of space was between her and the Queen - who prevented me from jumping to her defence by placing her hand on my shoulder. "I sent my daughter away because of your damned curse, which you didn't cast because you knew I would regret it for the rest of my life. That boy is an orphan because of your cruelty and I tried to save him from a life with you." When I looked to her in question, she squeezed reassuringly and I lowered the hand that had shot to the hilt of my sword as Snow spoke.

The sharp bark of laughter that followed made me wince and I almost pitied the woman, knowing she was about to be verbally torn to pieces. "As opposed to a life with you? A woman who abandoned her own child for the sake of memories and the love of her nauseating, idiotic Consort? One who was responsible for the death of a sweet, innocent man because she ___can't keep her mouth shut_."

I knew I was taking a risk when I spoke - as she had told me not to before we left – but I also knew what she was capable of doing when she was angry and it was rather difficult to ignore the fact she was becoming so when the hairs on the back of my neck were standing at attention. "My Queen?"

Her jaw rippled in response, but she gave a slight nod and I turned my attention to Snow. "We came to insure the Queen's subjects had arrived safely and were reunited with their children. Once confirmed, we will leave."

Snow's gaze drifted between the two of us briefly before she nodded and took a hesitant step back. She replaced her scowl with a facade of innocence and ignorance that rivalled even the Queen's own masks, something I would have no doubt been impressed by had I not been busy trying to resist beheading her where she stood. "They arrived early yesterday morning, as soon as I figured out they were the parents, I sent them to where their daughters were staying."

At that, Regina's anger seemed to evaporate in a matter of seconds and she tilted her head to the side. "Were?"

Snow sighed. "For some unknown reason, most of them decided to return to your Kingdom, they'll most likely arrive in a day or two."

"Splendid." the Queen turned on her heel and marched toward the exit, belatedly beckoning me to follow with a "Come along, Emma." thrown over her shoulder.

I watched as that mask cracked upon Snow's features and halted my turn to leave when she said my name. "Emma?"

"Captain! I'm waiting." Regina's growl pushed aside my curiosity and I ignored Snow White calling after me as I made my way to the Queen's side, a smile coming to my lips when she snaked her arm around my waist.

Even though it had taken mere seconds for her to transport us back to the palace, it hadn't been fast enough for me to avoid hearing the distraught cries of my name being repeated over and over.


	14. Captain's Choice

Tired, dirty and just wanting this day to be over, I had almost forgotten that Killian agreed to meet me at the tavern. It had been two days since Regina and I visited the White Kingdom and the cries of Snow White continued to bother me. I assumed that her daughter and I shared the same name and that was the reason for her reaction to hearing it but what if - it seemed insane, considering the lost princess is supposed to be no more than a mere child and yet, I couldn't brush off the mounting similarities as simple coincidences any longer. I needed to speak to someone who had travelled worlds and a centuries old pirate seemed like the logical place to start.

I had to hurry if I didn't want to upset the Queen by showing up late to our evening in the garden. More than that – I was afraid if I wasn't on time, then she would leave and I would miss the opportunity. I didn't really believe that one night would mean the cancellation of all future ones, but it wasn't something I was about to risk.

So maybe in my rush to the tavern I was slightly more rude to the people I passed, completely ignoring their greetings and occasionally bumping into one or – four different people without offering them an apology. If I knew how to control my magic, I could save a considerable amount of time and lessen the peasants grumbling all around me but I don't know how, so they would just have to deal with it. I was sure somewhere down the road, I'd feel guilty about it and that was something _I_ would have to deal with. Fair compromise via stupid moral compass.

Pushing open the door to the tavern, I narrowly avoided bumping into one of the serving wenches and easily navigated the way to where Killian sat as his drunken singing provided a beacon – a rather painful beacon that made my ears want to detach from my head and flee the realm - but a beacon nonetheless.

"You really should stop that warbling, someone might think there's a murder being committed on a cat." I said as I slumped into the chair across from him.

Grinning widely, he slapped the table and drained what I assumed to be rum, beckoning for a refill before slamming the now empty mug back on the table. "Jealousy gets you nowhere, love – don't criticise my envious, angelic voice."

I had to take a minute to catch my breath as my laughter subsided before I could speak again. "Uh I hate to break it to you but I would appreciate the sounds of Amos straining over what you consider singing."

"Well, he does make some beautiful sounds when he's doing his business, it's hard to compete with that kind of music." He threw a salacious smile to the woman who came and refilled his drink before he turned it on me. "What did you need to talk about?"

Ignoring the desire to grimace and slap him, I rolled my eyes instead and jumped right in with my questions. "You've been to other worlds right?"

"Most of the known ones, yes."

By known, I assumed he meant magical worlds and since that wasn't important, I moved the conversation along. "Do you know anything about the passage of time? Like if in some worlds time is faster or slower than it is in others?"

Slowly, he nodded his head. "You mean can an hour pass in one world, where only a second has passed in another?"

Glad that I didn't have to explain since I had no idea how else I would have put it if he hadn't understood, I smiled. "I was thinking more along the lines of years to decades, but yeah."

"Well in Neverland time doesn't even exist."

Logically, one could assume that non-existent time proved it wasn't the same everywhere but it didn't really answer my question, one difference didn't make every other theory plausible. "So if you're trapped in one world for twenty years, is it possible that it's only been eight in another?"

"In Neverland I was 32 for.. well I'm not entirely sure. Here, I'm 36 and continue to age gracefully. Combining all my years, I'm almost 400 years old, love. Whether by seconds, days or years – time is never exactly the same in any world. So while no land comes to mind fitting those specific parameters, it _is _possible, yes."

Even though I had the answer that I needed, it didn't make my suspicions seem any less insane than they appeared but I knew that unless I confronted Regina with them, I wouldn't be able to let go of the questions I had and she would continue to hold on to whatever guilt she seemed to feel. I know she said she didn't regret her past but it was difficult to believe when she had admitted days earlier that she thought I would betray her and if this wasn't the secret that had her hesitant to confess, then I was at a complete loss.

"Okay, that's all I wanted to know – thank you for meeting me here."

He raised his mug in the form of a salute. "Any time, love."

* * *

In the midst of the garden behind one of her beloved trees, I stood and watched the Queen as she paced beside our bench. It turned out I had ended up being late, it wasn't by a significant amount of time but upon seeing her here, I was filled with a sense of happiness - she had waited for me. Just the sight of her gave me the confidence to step into view and once she spotted me, a brilliant smile lit up not only her eyes but her entire face. I had always thought she was beautiful but if I were being honest, her true beauty came only when a smile graced those lips.

When her mouth quickly turned down and I was treated to a sulky looking scowl, I kept my own smile in place as I walked the short distance to her. "You're late."

Standing before her, I placed my hands on her hips and smiled wider when she made no move to discourage me. "And you waited."

She sighed and draped her arms over my shoulders as she ran her fingers through my hair. "You've been acting strangely these last two days."

"Worried?" I teased.

She rolled her eyes. "Of course not."

"Uh huh." I leaned in and captured her lips in a slow, lazy kiss, moaning into her mouth as she pressed herself against me. It didn't take long before the kiss became heated and we stood there making out like teenagers for a few minutes.

I sighed as she pulled away from me and stepped out of reach. "While I appreciate the order of your priorities, are you going to tell me why you kept your Queen waiting?"

"Ah right I forgot, _a Queen waits for no one_." I smirked as I moved around her and took a seat on the bench, crossing my ankles as I watched her. "I have a question to ask you."

Regina shook her head as she sat down beside me. "Answer mine first and I'll consider letting you ask yours."

I thought about her question – I could of course simply tell her I was talking to Killian but then, she would probably want to know why that was more important than our time together and that seemed like a really dumb idea. Instead, I shrugged and said, "It kind of ties in with yours."

After a short pause in which I pretended to be oblivious as she glared at me, she sighed.

"Fine, what is it?" It was adorable how she pouted when she didn't get her own way – not that I was suicidal and planned to inform her of such, but I could at least think it.

"Am I the daughter of Snow White?"

Her eyes widened before she managed to school her features but her voice gave away just how surprised she was by the question when her only response was a strangled, "Pardon?"

It took effort not to roll my eyes, yet I managed as I repeated the question. "Snow White and Prince Charming, am I their daughter?"

"What makes you think that?" she sounded calmer, almost indifferent now - though her tone was still a little shaky.

"That day you found me in the forest when you were talking about the curse, you said _she _was the reason you didn't cast it when Red asked who I was and you told me you didn't cast it because it would cause Snow White more pain to know she sent her daughter away."

When she did nothing more than stare at me, I sighed and kept going. "Her daughter who she sent to another world, who has the same name as I do. Killian told me time isn't the same in every world, that it's possible that even though it's only been ten years here, I could be twenty-eight if I had stayed there."

After a few minutes of silence, she gave a wary sigh and said. "Well, I did admit that I admired your intelligence from the start."

It was my turn to be surprised then. "You... wanted me to figure it out."

"Did I?" she smiled.

"When you said my name in front of Snow, I thought it had been a slip of the tongue..." Everything began to click into place as I recalled the conversation with the fairy and what I had overheard that night. "This is what Blue forbid you from telling me? this is what you were arguing about the other night when I interrupted you.."

I stood and began to pace as the pieces continued to come together, then I remembered the comment about a deal they had and I suddenly understood why she hadn't told me. "And you can't even confirm that I'm right without being subjected to some stupid form of punishment."

"But I could deny it." she offered.

That hadn't occurred to me, but now that she mentioned it. "You're not going to?"

"No."

"You have a contract with her? One of those magical ones with consequences if you break whatever stipulations were made?" I could feel her eyes, watching me but I couldn't bring myself to look at her because I knew once she confirmed it, things were likely going to change and the thought - quite honestly - pissed me off. I've had to deal with enough change throughout my life because of other people's choices and I was sick of it.

"Something like that."

Frustrated, I sighed. "Why did you want to tell me?"

"I felt like I was lying to you."

I stopped my pacing then and finally looked at her. "You can do that you know, you're the Queen."

Regina laughed before another smile settled on her lips, this one unusually soft compared to the others I had been privileged to see. "I know, but I find that I want to be honest with you."

My heart sped up as questions and assumptions began to bounce around in my mind and I swallowed as I asked, "Why?"

She licked her lips before pinching the bottom one between her teeth and looking away as she answered. "Because with each day, it is becoming more obvious that you mean something to me."

"Oh.. well that's... good." I frowned at how incredibly awkward that sounded.

Her head snapped back around, an incredulous look and disbelief in her tone. "That's what you're going with?"

"No, I mean I obviously have uh feelings for you but I..." Floundering for the right words, I eventually gave up any notion of trying to be eloquent and finished lamely. ".. kind of suck at this."

She smiled as she stood from the bench and made her way over to me, her arms finding their way around my waist and I immediately felt myself start to relax. "I imagine this is somewhat overwhelming, you did only just find out you have parents that are alive and well."

"Is this why you thought I was going to betray you?"

She nodded weakly. "I thought you'd jump at the chance to meet your parents and escape the Evil Queen."

Raising my hand, I brushed my thumb along her cheekbone and smiled as she closed her eyes. "I don't have parents, they didn't raise me."

She sighed as she leaned her forehead against mine, the warm caress of her breath flitting across my lips as she murmured. "That was my fault, you can't blame them for that."

"I'm not looking to place blame, I'm simply stating a fact - I stopped needing parents a long time ago and knowing who they are now doesn't change that."

She pulled away just enough to look me in the eye, her gaze searching as she asked, "Don't you want to meet them? Get to know them and maybe tell them?"

Part of me did, more to sate my curiosity than anything but when I consider the cost. It had taken me a long time to find somewhere I could call home and just as long to find someone I thought would be worth fighting for. Perhaps in time my curiosity would evolve into something more, but for now – what I had was enough. "Not at the expense of starting a war and possibly losing you, no."

When she opened her mouth, I shook my head to interrupt what I assumed would be an attempt to convince me otherwise. "_You _are my Queen, I swore my life to you and for as long as you want it, it is yours."


End file.
